Nifty Nancy

Want!

2011-11-16T00:01:00.001-07:00

Source: bluepueblo.tumblr.com via Anna on Pinterest

Halloweenish 2011!

2011-11-01T11:43:00.011-06:00

I am so in love with Halloween. It brings in the season that my family and I love most. I love the crisp air and the fresh smell. I love the beautiful fall colors. I love the fact that my air conditioner is no longer running.

These are some of our fun October memories this year.

The makings of taco soup, our favorite fall meal. Except for the ground beef, which was cooking on the stove and still looked raw and gross.

Western Day for Red Ribbon Week!

Har! Crazy Hat Day!

Anna and Alex. Pumpkin time!

Gunder considers his options.

Abi sacrifices her hands to the pumpkin guts.

Aw yeah! Jengo Fett and Luke Skywaker. They are the cutest friends together and I love that they have so much fun. This was taken right before I dropped the boys off at a Halloween party that had all the makings of a fabulous time but which ended up freaking out Gunder after he walked, sobbing, through the spook alley. When I picked them up from the party, Luke Skywalker told me that if he had walked through with Gunder, he would have told him to stay away from the "biting place." I almost started sobbing, myself, at that point. (*disclaimer* The party was thrown by a wonderful classmate's equally wonderful mother, and my poor son has his mother's horrible imagination that occasionally has a hard time differentiating between real and make-believe. I was also assured the children were not bitten.)

Trick-or-treating last night was awesome. We did the trunk or treat at the church parking lot and then hit a few houses on our street. Finished the night off at my sister's house with bowls of my brother-in-law's famous and utterly delectable chili and a viewing of "Sleepy Hollow," which never fails to delight. (The Tim Burton one, not the cartoon, although I do love the cartoon as well.) It's hard to go wrong with Johnny Depp and Christopher Walken.

And just because:

"Sleepy Hollow" brings to mind images of classic Tim Burton. The dark scenes, everything blueish--the gross orange blood that spurts everywhere. Very "Sweeny Todd." Which also brings to mind the time my husband went with a friend of his to see "Sweeny Todd." ("Dude, did you know this was a musical?")

Talents--what are they, really?

2011-10-25T14:18:00.001-06:00

Recent discussions with friends got me thinking on the subject of talents--we've probably all heard it before but I think, as women especially, we need reminders.

The scriptures tell us that we are all blessed with talents, diverse and varied, and we are expected to do something with them. A few years ago, I was involved in my ward's Enrichment Night celebration of talents. There were a wide array of us, sharing the things we'd accomplished and basking in the glow. We had a combination of writers, artists and composers.

There was a problem.

I heard later that one of the sisters told her husband she'd never attend another meeting like that one because she came away feeling like such a loser. According to her own assessment, she couldn't write, draw, paint or compose music. Ergo, no talent.

This couldn't be farther from the truth.

Not all talents produce a physical, tangible product. A loving Father has blessed us with talents both outwardly impressive and quietly crucial. Drawing on experiences of women I know, I'm going to show you what I mean.

Woman "A" is a stay-at-home mom with three beautiful kids. She's younger than I am and really has her stuff together. She has a testimony but knows how to relate in the "world," to find joy in the world. Her children are smart, the house is amazingly decorated, she cans food, knits beautifully (and learned only last year!) and gives attention to her callings while still maintaining an awesome homefront. She does these things on a shoestring budget as her husband finishes grad school. She knows who she is and is comfortable in her own skin. She's also incredibly funny and sarcastic. This makes me love her even more.

Woman "B" is dependable, gracious, lovely and generous to a fault. She cares for others despite her own illnesses. She volunteers, serves, takes care of family, delivers beautiful fireside messages, writes roadshows, and often crashes when it's all said and done because her body often can't keep up with her spirit. Now granted, she is a writer and that's one of those talents we're not discussing here, but take away the writing piece and she's still one of the most amazing people I know.

Woman "C" is one of the most beautiful and glamorous people I know in real life. She has four gorgeous kids and a gorgeously decorated home. She is put together at all times, in all things and in all places. Her attention to detail is second to none and her taste is impeccable. She is also one of the most genuinely nice people I know. I mean NICE. The first time I met her she was new in the ward and came to visit teach me with her companion. I made a snap judgment upon first clapping eyes on her, only to have it dissolve within the first five minutes of conversation. I've known her for years and that has never changed. She is genuine, classy, smart, funny and so very kind. She is more beautiful on the inside, even, that trust me, that's saying something.

Woman "D" has five children and she and her husband want one more. She is runs a home of delightfully chaotic organization and is an awesome mom. She plays with her kids, she is calm about spills, she loves her current role and is doing a darn good job with it. Having so many children and running an efficient house are skill sets that I do not possess. I have only three children, two of which are nearly adults, and I still can't find socks or a room in my house that's consistently tidy and organized.

I could go on with women "E" through "Z," but I hope you see where I'm going with this. Kindness is a talent. Organizational skills are a talent. Amazing church and community service, that is a talent. As are the following: compassion, dedication, dependability, charity, a strong work ethic, humble spirituality, seeking for and attaining knowledge, the ability to make others smile, a good grasp of life's priorities, etc.

Those talents that aren't so easily visible in terms of outward appearance are those I refer to as "quietly crucial." They are the crux of life, for they almost always mean some sort of service to others, whether in the community or within the walls of our own homes. Love is usually the root motivator, and love is pure.

Now. Let's say you've always wanted to be a photographer. Or to learn to sew. Or write poetry or your life story. Your life story in poem form. Just because you didn't leave the womb as an expert in these areas, does that mean you shouldn't try? I believe that we should spend a lifetime examining and reaching for talents we may not even know we have. We should do what we can to learn about the topic and then not be afraid to try it.

Woman "A" I mentioned above learned to knit last year. She is amazingly good at it. And we have another friend who is THAT MUCH MORE amazingly good at it, and she also just learned how to knit last year. So let's say we have me, we'll call me "good." We'll call Woman "A" "better," and we'll call Amazing Knitting Prodigy Woman "best." Does this mean I don't have a talent for knitting. No. What it means is that if I want to continue to grow and develop this talent, I must work at it. Just because my talent doesn't have me at the top of that particular game doesn't mean I don't have the talent for it.

Talents take work. With the possible exception of Mozart, I've not heard of anyone whose talents didn't require practice and honing. And truthfully, Mozart certainly progressed throughout his life--he didn't write Eine Kleine Nachtmusik at the age of 8. (Although he did write other music that I can't begin to replicate at the age of 8. Let's not talk about him anymore.)

In the New Testament we find the Parable of the Talents. One man did amazing things with his, the second man did good things with his, and the third man buried his talent. Talents, in this story, refer to currency, but the point is the same. If we bury it, it stays as it is and is of benefit to nobody--not family or friends, and not ourselves. Certainly not to our Father, who gave us those talents in the first place.

I have homework for you. Your job tonight (or tomorrow night, or anytime this week you have a few free minutes, but for sure before Sunday) is to make a list of your talents. I'm not talking about the ones that produce something tangible. First you start with you, and you list the things you ARE. Then continue the list and write down those things you produce. Maybe you're really good at canning or gardening. Maybe you can put together an awesome scrapbook. Maybe you read the newspaper front to back each day and can tell me exactly what's going on in Libya. Perhaps you know how to sew aprons on a machine. Perhaps you can give one heck of a presentation to your boss and colleagues, with or without the Powerpoint. Maybe you're the one in the office who remembers everybody's birthdays or notices when someone is down and you buy them an African Violet. Unless it's a man who's down...you buy him a chocolate doughnut.

You keep this list in your journal, and if you don't have a journal, you grab a notebook or staple some computer paper together and start one. And perhaps on the other side of this list, you will write down a few things you'd like to do, a few talents you'd like to grow. We may have talents buried that need digging up.

Grab a shovel!

The Happiest Place on Earth

2011-09-06T22:19:00.001-06:00

Not much longer until we have a fabulous family vacation and I'm so looking forward to it. We are absolute Disney geeks. Pictures soon will follow. :-)

Sometimes Motherhood Works

2011-04-15T16:39:00.006-06:00

My heart is so full, and has been for the past couple of weeks. Thanks to participation in an ATC program, Nina is already graduated from high school! Words cannot express how much joy and pride I feel in her accomplishments. She has worked hard, has not always (hardly ever) enjoyed that hard work, and I hope I've expressed to her how proud I am to be her mother.

Anna transferred to Ogden High and is happy. I've never seen her so happy. She has a very sweet best friend. She just got her grades in the mail the other day--ripped open the envelope and stuck it on the fridge. She is proud, and we are delighted. All A's, two B+'s. She has always been my Annabelle, snuggly and feisty and fun. It is a joy to be her mother.

Gunder brings home 100% scores pretty consistently on his PRE-tests for both Math and Language Arts. He's reading more every day. At PTCs, his teacher told me how well he is doing, and I am so pleased. He also just finished a wrestling class that Mark's been taking him to at the high school, where his coach and older fellow wrestlers are so incredibly patient with a little guy who very much wants to be a big, cool guy. He has melted my heart from the first moment I heard his heart beat, and I have been enchanted with him ever since. I so love being his mother.

Sometimes motherhood sucks. Sometimes it's the hardest thing in the world, and it's no mystery why some species choose to eat their young in the nest. Children take the best we have to offer and suck us completely dry. We worry, we fret, we steam and stew, we swear, we get murderous, we lose brain cells from the moment we first bring them home from the hospital or the birth mom.

And it is the most glorious of gifts. The love a mother feels for a child goes beyond all comprehension. It defies description. Sometimes you just grab and kiss them, amidst a flurry of protestations and noises of distress. You look at them when they're scrubbed and clean, even when they're 18 and 16, scrubbed and clean, and feel a connection, a sense of overwhelming emotion. You remember when you brought them home and you think that maybe the loss of a few brain cells isn't such a bad thing.

My heart and my joy are so full.

Book bigamy? Why yes, thank you, I will indulge.

2011-01-16T22:24:00.000-07:00

So I got a Kindle for Christmas.

I know. I know! But I love it, I do. It's been the most amazingly fun toy I've received in a long time. I have a gazillion books at my fingertips and if I'm not in the mood for the one I was reading last night, hey, I can switch at the push of a button.

I swore I'd remain a purist, and I did, for a long time. But I've found, to my delight, that there's room for both ebooks and the real physical thing in my heart. For books that I don't really care to own but do want to read, the Kindle is great. What's more, I can put it in my purse and read any old thing I want while waiting in line, waiting in the car, waiting...waiting...waiting...

But for those books whose mere physical makeup is a work of art, in whom I must underline, ponder, turn pages and smell, those are the books I will still enjoy owning and buying. I confess, I was a bit worried at first because I fell so in love with my Kindle, and so quickly, that I wouldn't care about going book browsing anymore...(What? What?)

But I went to lunch with some of my favorite author friends the other day--well, ok, I'll name drop-- Jennie Hansen, Kerry Blair, Gale Sears and Cheri Crane, and after chatting and laughing, we went to Barnes and Noble because sweet Kerry wanted to buy my newest book so I could sign it for her. She made a fuss in the store as I signed her book ("It's such a good thing the author is right here to sign this for me! There are a couple more on the shelf; you'd better grab them soon...") and I was blushing and laughing.

The thing that I loved so much about being in the store, though, was the euphoria I felt looking at all of the new releases--the artwork, the fonts, the covers, the smell. It was as though an old lover had taken me back despite my infidelity. I was in heaven.

I bought Sarah Ban Breathnach's Peace and Plenty, Cheri Priest's awesome steampunk, The Boneshaker, and the most recent issue of Writer's Digest magazine, which is my favorite writer's reference of all.

It was delightful and heady and I felt like a very happy bigamist as I rode home on the train with my Kindle in my purse and Sarah's new book open in my lap. The experience would have been utter bliss if I hadn't fallen asleep as I was trying to read, which is no reflection on the book, itself. It was the lull of the blasted train.

Good thing I wasn't driving. :-)

A Real Dad

2010-12-21T09:30:00.000-07:00

So my dad is a therapist, and a good one. It was nice to have one on hand for all of those traumatic, hormonal teen years. I was always a daddy's girl-absolutely adored him-and probably still am, truth be told. Today is his birthday and I'm thinking about an experience that's taught me something about parenting.

I am the oldest of five kids, and when I was a teenager, naturally, I slept in. One of those Saturdays, my dad decided to take my younger siblings downtown on the bus, because they'd never ridden it before. (I, of course, opted to sleep in instead.) The story goes as follows, and I wish I would have witnessed it personally. They took the bus downtown, ate some breakfast, had to run to catch a connecting bus, for which my dad was glad because everyone should have the experience of having to run for the bus, and had a grand old time riding around town. My younger sister, who was probably 10 at the time, said, "Dad, today you're being a REAL dad."

We all laugh about that, and as a therapist and professor of Child and Family Studies, my dad often reflected on that whole "real dad" concept. In my sister's mind, the extra time spent doing something fun made for such a rich experience.

It's easy to get stuck in the rut of daily, mundane duties that must be done. The dishes and laundry don't do themselves, the toys won't pick themselves up, etc. But there are those times when I play a board game with my son or hang out with my daughters that make for the "real mom" moments. It doesn't have to involve a lot, or any, money. What it does require is time. That can be hard, unless you carve it out of an already full day, and make it a priority, even if only for a short time.

Happy Birthday to my dad, who is amazing and wonderful and such a Real Dad. Love you much.

What is it about mornings?

2010-11-30T09:02:00.004-07:00

So Jules drops off Alex this morning and two minutes later, knocks on the door again. She stands there looking at me for a minute and then says, "Nevermind." She was going to ask for a diaper wipe because she sat in Alex's juice in the car, but then realizes the damage is too extensive and she'll have to go home and change. As she turns around to leave, I see an enormous wet spot. I figure it is an omen for the morning.

I go to wake up Gunder, who has had Too Much Thanksgiving. (See the Berenstain Bears Too Much Birthday.) He is still trying to recover from the freedom and unabashed joy of vacation from school and he is losing the battle. He has a hard time getting up, and my gentle prodding and kisses on his cheeks aren't doing it. I realize I'm not going to be able to bribe him every day, like I did yesterday, with a new toy if he'll just get moving and be a big boy. I'll go broke, and have one extremely spoiled kid. Well, more spoiled, anyway.

The clock is ticking, so I finally drag him downstairs with a blanket where he sits on the couch, rolled up in a ball. He migrates to the heater vent and I try to muscle him into his clothes. He screams that they're too cold to put on, and I feel an aneurysm coming on because the heat is blasting me in the face and I'm ready to Vesuvius. I ponder on the fact that I should have started waking him up about two hours earlier.

I get myself dressed, and looking at the cold and snow outside, decide to put on my snazzy new black boots. The only problem is that the teenage girls have informed me that I need to tuck my pants into them. I have told them that all my jeans are boot cut, that I don't wear skinny jeans, a fact for which they should thank me daily. They tell me to peg the boot cuts. I've already done the pegging. It was in the 80s when I was on the cutting edge of fashion.

With a shrug, I peg the pants. It looks...passable. I've cooled off, now that I'm no longer standing in the heater vent's direct line of fire, and realize I need a sweater. I throw on the Mrs. Weasley sweater Nina makes fun of, and a baseball cap because my hair is atrocious. I avoid the scarf, which I love, but generally makes me gag in the morning. (Thank you, Grandma Campbell, for the lovely genes.)

Gunder doesn't want his usual apple or Gogurt for breakfast, and Alex suggests cinnamon toast, to which Gunder reluctantly agrees. By now, it's five minutes away from departure and Gunder is still missing socks and shoes. I make the toast and throw it at the boys, stuff Gunder's feet into his socks and shoes, turn around to grab the coats only to realize that Gunder has kicked off his shoes because his feet "feel weird."

I sit on the couch with an inhuman growl and tell him it's just the socks bunching up. He tears up a little and says he's sorry, and I look at his puffy, bloodshot eyes and my heart breaks. I want to tell him he never has to go to school again, that I'll homeschool him and that no woman in the world will ever love him more than his mother. Instead, I kiss him, rub his face a little, and then shove his feet back into the shoes. I tell him that when he walks, he won't notice the socks. (Which we all know is a lie.)

We get out to the car, and it's, oh, 9 degrees outside. Yesterday, Mark cleaned off my car and warmed it up for me before he left for work. Today there's no new snow, and I'm sure he figured I could manage the warming up part by myself. He didn't take into account the fact that I, also, have had Too Much Thanksgiving.

Gunder shivers as he tries to buckle himself in while I get Alex into his carseat. Alex tells me he's hot, and I tell him he isn't. He insists he's hot, and I look at his red cheeks, realizing he probably is. The kid has an inner furnace like no other. Being hot makes him livid. By now, Gunder is shivering so much he's getting a good workout. He has zero body fat.

We pick up Jonas, and I put him and the carseat into the way back by Gunder, because the three of them don't like being squished together in the middle row. Check that. GUNDER doesn't like being squished in the middle row. As I buckle Jonas in, the fumes from the exhaust make their way into the car, and the boys all begin to gag. I tell them to stop it. At least it's warm.

My snazzy new boots are useless against the cold. They are content being just snazzy.

Gunder's mood improves as we get underway. Jonas tells him jokes and Alex is singing some ditty about farm animals. The line at the school is about 20 miles long. I tell the boys to sit tight and we make our way to the drop off point in front of the school. Rather than slow traffic further, I tell the boys to get ready to unbuckle and climb over the seat to the middle row, where they can open the door themselves and get out. They laugh themselves silly, which escalates to cackling and then maniacal screaming as they flail about, arms, legs and backpacks everywhere.

They stumble and fall out of the car, with Alex calling for Gunder to tell him goodbye. Gunder tries to slam the door, but a Huggies diaper wipe container is in the way. He throws the container back in while I yell at him to tell Alex goodbye. He shuts the door with a quick, "Goodbye, Alex!" and he and Jonas walk to the door together like the cool 6 and 7 year-olds they are.

On the way home, Alex drops his toy car and has a meltdown, wanting me to get it for him RIGHT NOW. I pull into the Conoco drive-up window and order a 44 oz decaff Diet Coke, cursing the fact that I have a psychological addiction to a cold beverage. I am grateful, however, that it is void of calories, otherwise I would be as wide as a barn door. At least I've kicked the caffeine, which makes my heart a-fib. My sister who works at the hospital tells me it's not actually a-fibbing, it's PVCs, which does me no good because all I can visualize with that are white plastic pipes.

We finally make it home, and when we get inside, Alex proves he has assimilated himself well by following in the fine Allen tradition of FREAKING OUT if something isn't working well. He can't get his coat off, and I did mention he hates being hot? He also has a spot on his pants which makes me nervous because he's been battling some nasty diarrhea the last few days.

All because Julie sat in the juice. ;-)

Some things you CAN take with you...

2010-11-22T21:52:00.002-07:00

This week, I am grateful for books. Well ok, I’m always grateful for books. I am, without a doubt, a nerd of the first order, but as I know a lot of other people who love to read and writ--and I do hold them in high esteem--I figure I’m in good nerd company.

The reason it’s coming to mind so readily now, however, is because of a quote by Richard G. Scott that I came across a few days ago: “After this life, you will be restored to that which you have here allowed yourself to become.” This is wonderful—after we end our journey here, we will be restored to what we’ve worked on. Basically, it sounds to me like we get to pick up where we left off.

I’ve often heard the quote that runs something along the lines of “you can’t take it with you when you go,” and I’ve always taken that as two-fold. One, the physical trappings here on earth don’t amount to much when we’re dead, and two, since all I can take with me when I go is what I’ve managed to put into my head, I’d better stuff it as full as possible.

Enter real life. Life has a way of intruding on the best of intentions, and the time slips by more quickly every day. I tell myself I’m going to learn about this or that, make a study of some author I’ve been meaning to get to, and it just doesn’t seem to happen. But as much as I do love books, there are lessons to be learned from those real-life experiences that suck up all of our time. I figure if I can somehow sandwich in book time with living, I should be good to go.

This is such a fun time of year, and it’s a blessing, really, to take the time to actually count our blessings and be grateful for what we have. My list this year could probably stretch on for pages, and I think, in fact, that that’s exactly what I’ll do. I’m going to make a list of every little thing I am thankful for and see how long the list stretches.

I challenge you to do the same! Have a wonderful, wonderful Thanksgiving holiday.

SWEET!

2010-11-09T15:36:00.001-07:00

My new cover! I have permission to spread it far and wide. This is my tenth novel, Isabelle Webb, The Pharaoh's Daughter. The release date is January, 2011, and for readers who were mad that there was so much time between this one, and Legend of the Jewel, you'll be happy to know that I'm working on the third and final book as we speak. I have no clue what the title is- for now I'm calling it Isabelle Webb, Crazy in Greece. :-)

So excited!

Monday morning dawns bright and chaotic.

2010-09-13T10:04:00.007-06:00

So Julie arrives here at 7:20 with Alex in tow. Says he might have thrown up a bit in his bed while coughing last night, and his hair might smell like it. Ok, bye!

Gunder wants to stay in bed. He has huge circles under his eyes which makes me feel like a horrible mother.

I realized last night that before I made carpool arrangements with Peggy that I'd told Wendy I'd take her boys to school this morning. Not a big deal, but it bumps Jonas's pick-up time up about 10 minutes.

Alex has been riding in Gunder's car seat, and Gunder has been riding in the adult seat, which is very horrible of me. So I get Alex's car seat out of the garage and muscle it into the car- after having a massive tug-of-war with Gunder's car seat, which has been securely hooked into the metal things behind the seat. Safety and all.

Gunder is inside eating goldfish crackers for breakfast, because that's all he wants. I hurry him along, put on the shoes that are too small (but I don't beat myself up on this one too much because he has an identical pair that are the right size...somewhere) and drag him into the bathroom where I shove his head into the sink and wet his hair down. He screams and I yell that it's just a little water, for crying out loud.

I comb his hair back so he looks like a gangsta from the 20s. His sisters, who have already left for school, would be mortified. I am glad they're not here to see it.

I remember I've already put Alex in the car and hurry Gunder out the door after slapping the correct size of shoes on his feet. Forget to brush his teeth, which is now making me cringe. He's sitting in school with fuzzy teeth. He's a fuzzy-toothed gantsta. But at least I remembered to wash his clothes last night and did get them ironed this morning.

We pick up Kord and Kade, who are looking clean and scrubbed, if somewhat tired. They climb into the car, and I let Kord sit in the front because he's now 13 and the airbag won't kill him if it deploys. Kade climbs into the middle by Alex, and I explain to the boys that he didn't really just throw up, it only smells like it. Yum. Going to school first thing in the morning in a car that smells like barf.

Gunder is sitting in the way-back, and we pick up Jonas, who joins him on his own little booster seat. Peggy is gracious about the fact that it's actually closer to 8 now, rather than the 7:50 I texted her about in a panic last night at 10:30. Gunder and Jonas are Kindergarten and 1st grade, respectively, and they begin telling knock-knock jokes that involve bananas, monkeys, eyes, noses...I draw the line when they begin peeing. I tell Kord that he should remember some of those awesome jokes to tell his friends. He looks at me with a half-smile and rubs his hands together, clearly cold because the windows are cracked to clear out the barf smell.

As we near the older boys' school, Kord tells me he hopes they go to the park and not rock climbing today because he forgot to have his mom sign the release for rock climbing and he really wants to go. Wendy and I have been the closest of friends for years, and I remember when Kord was born. I figure that makes us close, and I offer to sign the release form for Wendy- we both have pretty handwriting- so he can rock climb if it turns out that's what they're doing today. He looks dejected. The release form is in his locker, and I have given him only enough time to get to class before the bell rings. He can't run the form back out to me to sign, and besides, I'm not altogether certain he's comfortable with the idea anyway.

I drop off Kord, remind him to tuck in his shirt (The kids all wear uniforms. I know. We're mean moms.) He says he will and leaves. I swing around to drop Kade off at the intermediate building, where he hops out of the car without a backward glance, likely relieved to be away from barf-boy, who calls him "Cave."

I swing down the street to drop the little guys off at the elementary building. Jonas is telling Gunder something I can't hear because Alex heard "Life is a Highway" playing on the radio and wanted me to turn it up louder. ("Mack and McQueen!") I hear Gunder telling Jonas, "Well, that's a rip-off!" Jonas looks at him like he's from Mars. Gunder says, "They used the wrong building plans, then!"

I am too tired to sort it out, curious though I am. I pull into the congested side-street next to the school and help the boys get out of the back. I help Jonas down, which seems to offend him very much. I try to help Gunder down but he tells me he can do it himself. He jumps down and I barely get a kiss. They take off running for the front door, backpacks flying, with me yelling at them to be good and remember the rules. If I thought they were old enough to be embarrassed by it, I'd also yell for them to look forward to scripture study after school. This works great with my girls.

I maneuver my way out of the obnoxious SUV zoo in my obnoxious SUV and head for home. Pick up a Diet Coke on the way, and when Alex asks for a Sprite, I tell him we need to be healthy and I'll give him a glass of water at home. When we pull into the driveway, he talks me out of going for a walk. He says he doesn't want to, and frankly, neither do I.

We turn on Dora, which he unfortunately loves these days, and I slice him an apple to eat with his goldfish crackers. He also wants some cinnamon toast, and I feel good about the fact that at least one of the little boys got a fairly good-size breakfast this morning.

I slice myself some strawberries to go with my divine Diet Coke, proud that I'm eating strawberries and not Doublestuff Oreos for breakfast. Just to make sure I don't feel too good about myself, though, I sprinkle a little sugar on top of them. Humility is a virtue, after all.

:-)

Bittersweet

2010-09-10T14:45:00.005-06:00

Bittersweet heart today- my daughter, Nina, is on the mend. She's had a nasty bout of viral pneumonia and is finally on the upswing. We're glad, because she's begun her senior year and starting her final high school swim season. Well, that's not the only reason we're glad she's getting better, but it's important.

I'm looking forward to the meets, long as they are, because I often get to sit with Wendy and yak up a storm, something we are both very good at. I also like the down time away from the little boys, darling as they are. Most of the time, meets are fun for me. (Except the one last year at Viewmont- I had a head cold and thought I was going to implode between the noise and all the chlorine in the air. That and the fact that I suddenly looked at my beautiful daughter's beautiful stroke through the water and thought to myself...Hey, wait a minute! I don't want her to get a scholarship somewhere. I don't want her to move away from me. I want her to stay forever in my house, leaving her stuff all over the place and staying up way too late, clanking her dishes around in the kitchen and making her dad and I wonder if we should just come right out and tell her she needs to get to her room for the night so we can at least make out in peace.)

Anna is fun and is getting more fun, more tender, more responsible as the days go by. We are enjoying her so much. By the time she's ready to leave home, I'm sure I'll find it a struggle to keep that stiff upper lip stiff.

And yet today, I have the word "Love" written on my arm in pink ink with a heart around it in tribute to suicide awareness week and in honor of my friend, Catina, who lost her daughter to suicide last year. I am in love with my daughters, and I ache for Catina. And yet I also am so glad that Catina has her sweet Antonio and Maia, that motherhood still keeps her busy. As I looked at my arm a while ago, the ink got all blurry and I felt my eyes burn. Strange. I thought I had cried all my tears for Abbey last year when it happened.

Our souls are eternal. Love is eternal. Our Heavenly Parents and Savior are eternal. We lift each other, and sometimes we are the ones who need lifting. And don't we all have people in our lives for whom we would gladly take all the pain? I suppose that when we hurt for other people we aren't necessarily lightening their load, but perhaps there is comfort in commiseration, in companionship. It takes a village, that I firmly believe, and not only to raise a child, sometimes just to make it through life as an adult.

I'm grateful for my village and all the wonderful people in it. I'm glad for moments that cause me to reflect on it.

Tony Blair, Tom Brady, the Kardashians and Mother Teresa

2010-09-09T13:57:00.012-06:00

So I am a stay-at-home with a writing career sandwiched on the side. I have two daughters in high school, a son in Kindergarten (and believe it or not, he was planned!) and I babysit my 2-year-old nephew during the day. It's a busy life, kind of polar-opposite ends of family stages with two girls almost graduated and two little guys just starting out, but odd as it is, I love it.

My tv is set, by default(when we're not watching Diego or those obnoxious Fresh Beats) to HGTV or MSNBC. I find them both comforting. Today I was in the mood for news, and I listened passively while I cleaned up Top Ramen and my husband's deadly salsa from last night. ("Honey, it won't be that hot, really." "But Mark, the label on the chilies says 'Mojave'...")

So anyway, I was listening to the news and a story about Tony Blair's new book came on. Turns out there've been protests wherever the man wants to sign his book, and he even had to cancel the launch party. People are angry. But the book is FLYING OFF THE SHELVES. Which really just goes to show, there is no such thing as bad publicity. Makes me wonder if I would mind people throwing eggs and crap at me as long as they bought my books in droves. Unfortunately I have just enough George Costanza in me to not handle it at all well. ("People HAVE to like me!")

From there, we went into a story about Tom Brady getting in a wreck today (?) that was bad enough for the other driver to have to be extracted with the jaws of life. I didn't catch who was at fault- presumably the other guy- but what cracked me up was the footage later of Brady at football practice. "...And here he is, shortly after the wreck, at practice..." Makes me think of how funny it is that people are in wrecks every day but only famous ones make it into the news. Duh, you say, and I know. But just imagine this: "This is John Doe- he was in an accident today and the other driver had to be extracted with the jaws of life. Now here we see John, later that same day, at work in his office. Making an important phone call, seems to be doing well, will probably make it for the board meeting scheduled for Friday at 2:00..." Maybe that makes no sense at all- and it looks weird now that I've written it, but man, it seemed funny at the time.

From here I jump back a few weeks to me standing in line at the grocery store. On the cover of a magazine was a pic of the Kardashian sisters, all kinds of torqued at each other for one weighing more than the other. Next to them on the magazine rack was a picture of Mother Teresa in a magazine issue commemorating her life. I'm sure I don't have to belabor the point too much for you to see where my thoughts took me. Where is the true beauty?

Life is funny and full and wonderful and hard and divine. I love this time of year- love getting out the harvesty-colored table cloths and decor. I love planning Halloween costumes with the kids. I love getting the sweaters back out and smelling the air when the temperatures start to change and you know summer is on its way out and fall is coming in.

So here's to Tony Blair- may you sell many books and effectively dodge rotten eggs. I suspect history will be kinder to you than the present is. Here's to Tom Brady- throw that ball for all you're worth, and good luck to John Doe in his Friday board meeting. To the Kardashians, I say I forgive you for leaching my brain cells out of my ears every time I look at the lot of you, and to Mother Teresa, I smugly and yet humbly admit I'd rather be like you than much of Hollywood.

Except the guys in Rush! (Not Limbaugh, the rock band.) Saw a documentary on VH1 classics that has made me a fan even beyond what I already liked about their music. But that's a rave for another day...

Life in the OT: What's a Girl to Do?

2010-06-22T00:08:00.001-06:00

I'm currently teaching Gospel Doctrine in my ward. I was called toward the end of last year, so essentially have been teaching Old Testament since the beginning of the calling.

Yikes.

I've been so intimidated that I've done a mountain of research for each lesson because I know there are people in the class who know the scriptures a lot better than I do, and I don't want to get it wrong.

I've learned lots of things so far. One of the things I've come to appreciate the most is an understanding of the social life and traditions of the people in the OT. Some things have seemed so bizarre to me until I've done a little digging and have been able to figure out why the people behaved the way they did.

Our God, in His infinite wisdom, allows us to structure our societies as we see fit. Many times they are fraught with inequalities, silliness and cruelty. Ignorance. But He allows it because He promised He would. It's one of His many gifts. Agency.

That agency, however, led to some wacky beliefs contained in the Old Testament that have me often shaking my head. For centuries, for example, women were valued very little and then mostly for their reproductive capabilities. So much of their identities were tied up in whether or not they were able to bear children, and then hopefully male children. (Don't ask me what they were thinking- I'm not sure how long they planned to have the species continue to perpetuate itself without the birth of girl children, but hey. What do I know.)

The OT peoples also knew of the coming of a promised messiah. Women of Israel hoped that He would be born through their lines, so not only was there pressure to bear children, there was also this hope that they would be the ancestor of the Savior. It's a lot of pressure, and dependent largely upon the luck of the biological draw.

There are stories, however, that jump out at me as incredible. We just finished covering Ruth, and I LOVED researching her story. She is amazing, and I love her. Naomi, also, I would like to count as a friend. Their friendship is lovely and inspiring. And Ruth was able to have a son when she married Boaz, so lucky girl, her worth went up several notches in the eyes of the locals. Even Naomi's friends were happy for her when Ruth gave birth. (Their comments of adulation went something along these lines: "Yay! Now Naomi again has a reason to live! A grandson!")

All snarkiness aside, I understand the desire for motherhood. I count among my blessings the fact that I've not known the pain of being unable to have babies. I do not take this blessing for granted. One of the things I can relate to when I think of these ancient women is the desire for children and the joy when they arrive. (Funny- we're not often told of how they handled the teen years...)

My daughters are 17 and 15, my son is 5. They have caused me tears of anger and frustration and tears of unabashed joy. I'm grateful to live in a time where my intellect is valued over the functionality of my uterus, however, and I'm grateful to learn of these people who lived so long ago and lived lives of faith and hope despite their various challenges.

Kind of like we do today, really.

And as a side-note: if you're looking for some mothers and families to offer a quick prayer for, check this link.

Moms who could use a prayer or two.

The Adventures of Gunder and Alex

2010-06-14T14:41:00.004-06:00

Ah, Monday morning. It dawns early and inevitable. I like to think that in a few years, they'll opt for sleeping in as opposed to getting up and putting buckets on their heads.

We also made tortillas today, and they were so helpful.

We might try bread tomorrow. :-)

She Drives!

2010-06-02T23:13:00.001-06:00

Nina has her driver's license! It's official. She can now drive legally down the street without Mark or me in the car with her. She's happy and we're happy. Now I can send her to Conoco to get me a Diet Coke.

Observations from 13.1 miles

2010-05-17T09:10:00.001-06:00

So I just ran my first half marathon. I observed some things along the way.

1. I should have gone ahead and used the porta-potty after crossing the start line. It seemed so prosaic, though, to enter a green outhouse just after beginning my first-ever race.

2. I think I managed to stay ahead of the three octogenarians with the walking sticks.

3. Vanilla Bean Gu, while not necessarily tasty, did not make me vomit. In fact, just as I was to the point where I was thinking I needed to eat something, there it was in the hands of an angelic volunteer like a beacon in the night. Oh good, come to me you gelatinous packet of crap.

4. Vanilla Bean Gu contains caffeine, which I suspect helped stave of the headache I usually get if I haven't had a vat of Diet Coke by about 8:30 a.m.

5. There are many different sizes and shapes of butts. At first, I confess I was mildly concerned about how I looked from the back as people passed me. By mile 11.5, I didn't care what they were looking at.

6. My son drew a happy face on my hand to help me think of him while I was running. Unfortunately, every time I looked at the happy face, I remembered a conversation he had with my daughter when we drove the course the week before:
Anna: I know, Mom. I'll get my bike and hide halfway down the canyon. Then I can join you.
Gunder: I have a better idea, Mom. Stay home.

7. Freddie Mercury makes a wonderful running companion. Were he not dead and gay (and I not married) I might just pursue him.

8. Mark was right--there were people wearing garbage bags for warmth. My guffawing father and I owe him an apology.

9. By the finish line, my fingers were the size and shape of Johnsonville Brats. We could have cut them off and had a bbq.

10. It may be possible, but I highly doubt there's a more beautiful course anywhere.

11. Grant Avenue stretches out in some funky twilight zone fashion between 21st and the finish line at 25th. The more you run, the farther away it gets.

12. It's the most amazing feeling in the world to see familiar faces along the side and hear them cheer. And hoping you're not so tired that you look like an absolute fool.

13. Even though my sister had to not run last minute because of a migraine, I still kept her close by wearing her jersey instead of mine. Plus, hers was a small and my medium was too big.

14. Roughly 140 people in my age group finished ahead of me, yet my husband made such a fuss over me that I felt like I'd beaten everyone, even the tight-muscled Vitruvian man-looking full marathoners that passed me halfway down the canyon.

15. I love my husband.

16. My dad and sister and three kids were at the finish line. It was overwhelming and awesome.

17. I have a medal now!

18. My brother-in-law and high school buddy just ran the full Salt Lake marathon in the same time it took me to go half that distance. I totally don't know where I was going with this and am getting depressed. Next!

19. I loved every single minute of this experience. Absolutely loved it. I ran/walked thirteen miles of my favorite spot on earth. It was divine and wonderful and so much fun. My wholehearted thanks to Catina, who talked to me about doing it, and my husband who overheard and then gave me the paid registration for Christmas in a new pair of running shoes.

20. Please, please bless that when I'm an octogenarian I'll have the wherewithal and physical ability to be doing a half marathon with walking sticks.

Right now

2010-04-01T22:05:00.007-06:00

The house is quiet- the hum of the dishwasher is the only sound. Gunder is in bed for the night. Hopefully he will stay there until morning. If he does, Mark will buy him a Slurpee- banana and pina colada mixed. Nina is with a friend, Anna is babysitting for Amy.

Gunder went with my parents today to the planetarium in Salt Lake to watch the 3-D Imax Hubble/space movie. He had such a good time, and to boot, came home with a dinosaur that TRANSFORMS. And when it transforms, it has Optimus Prime's face. This is a very big deal.

The girls cleaned their bedrooms- they look absolutely spotless, which is probably the worst possible thing they could have done. Now I know what they're capable of.

My next book is scheduled for January 2011 release, and I'm thrilled about that. Even better, the revisions I'll be doing on it are wonderful suggestions from reviewers and my editor- things I agree with wholeheartedly and I did not feel an ounce of defensiveness over the changes/additions that need to be made. It will be that much better of a book.

I finished knitting a hat that my daughter LIKES and is wearing. And my other daughter wants one like it, now.

I ran three miles tonight and am not dead. This is also a very big deal.

I have siblings who are my best friends and best friends who are my best friends. I am so happy in my realm right now. I wouldn't be anywhere else. The only thing I would change would be to move my brother and Salt Lake sister into the neighborhood. I would like to see them daily.

I have sweet parents who still check on me, even though I'm 40. My father-in-law was just called to be a Patriarch. Heaven willing, he will still be around when it's time for Gunder's blessing.

My husband works from sunup to sundown when he'd rather be chillin at the beach. He came to the desert to get me, and I'm so glad.

I am overwhelmed at my blessings. My little life is so complete. I have so much, and I am so grateful. Could be I'm feeling especially blessed because it's so quiet right now. It's moments of reflection like these, though, that give me energy for when life is hectic.

Right now I love...

2010-03-21T23:03:00.002-06:00

Right now I love:

*The "Cinderella" poops Gunder made with his Aunt Syd, Uncle Scott and his sisters
*A Town Like Alice by Nevil Shute
*The hat I'm knitting. Hopefully it will fit Nina's head.
*The book I'm getting ready to revise with my editor.
*The book I'm researching.
*My shiny kitchen sink, thank you Fly Lady.
*My Runner's World magazine. Makes me feel like the real deal.
*My 5-year-old baby that gets bigger by the day.
*My 17 and 14-year-old babies that make me crazier by the day.
*My husband who asks me if I want to throw down when I'm mad at him.
*Spring! Oh, sweet, glorious spring. I think I love you the most!

Weight loss, Corey Haim, Marie Osmond and terrorism

2010-03-10T10:25:00.004-07:00

So I gained about 10 pounds when last fall rolled around. I remember the exact moment when my control snapped and I flipped backward spectacularly into my old mindset. I made Halloween cookies for Gunder to give to his preschool friends. Sugar cookies and the most sinfully delectable frosting ever known. I SNARFED.

Then Thanksgiving hit. Ate more than I should. Then Christmas happened, and people like us so much they kept giving us treats. All of which I ate.

The good news is that I'm on the rebound, am running to try to train for a half marathon that my sweet husband signed me up for as a Christmas gift, and I'm down 3pounds. Only another 7 to get to the point where I was when I had wanted to lose another 10 by Christmas. ;-)

In other news, I see that Corey Haim has died. An incon of my teen years. In the words of my friend and facebok pal Erin, "RIP Corey Haim, you weirdo."

I read about Marie Osmond's tearful return to the stage yesterday, and I have to applaud her and all others who do their best to continue with life after the tragic loss of a loved one, especially a child.

Also came across this article on CNN, which I loved. Gives perspective to the fact that not only "those Muslims" are terrorists.

In other news, The Teen Writers Conference 2010 is fast approaching! If you know a teen who likes to write, send that wonderful person here. I will be presenting and am coordinating the writing contest. There will be tons of other cool authors there--it's really not to be missed!!

Happy Tuesday to one and all. :-)

Toyota, Black Mamba and The Pants!

2010-03-02T11:06:00.001-07:00

I've been watching the news and reading the paper with interest lately. Here's some of what has stuck out to me:

*The suit that O.J. Simpson wore when he was acquitted is going to be offered to the Smithsonian. My sincere hope is that the Smithsonian will say, "No, thank you."

*Toyota is being raked over the coals, among other things, for failure to alert the public for possible problems with their cars. Now GM is doing a recall on cars that may not steer well when driving under 15 miles an hour. Presumably, this will make the most-accidents-happen-within-two-miles-from-home statistic skyrocket. I'm thinking I should invest in a tandem bicycle for my family of 5. Might make school carpooling a bit of a challenge...

*My kids' school district sent home a notice that "Black Mamba" is now being banned from the schools in spite of the fact that it's not a illegal substance. Yet. Supposedly it has the same properties as marijuana. Now, I may not be remembering correctly and I threw the paper out, but I believe it can be burned as incense. Methinks school attendance would triple if teachers were allowed to use this in the classroom. ;-)

*The Norwegian Curling team's pants. Oh, how I loved those pants! The daily Facebook updates were a joy. I am a solid one-half Norwegian; I claim a special affinity to the pants.

*Lindsey Vonn is too unbelievably cute. Shouldn't be allowed.

*Kim Yu Na is the most amazing thing on ice I've ever seen and was a joy to watch. I did so with my mouth hanging open.

*Joannie Rochette is a beautiful example of grace and perseverance under extreme pressure and grief. What a lady. And a strong one.

*Gerald Imber wrote a book on William Halsted, America's "first" surgeon, entitled Genius on the Edge. In the book, Imber talks about how in the early days of anesthetic during dentistry, cocaine was used as a local. Um, yeah. Something tells me people didn't mind going to the dentist in those days. ;-) On a more serious note, though, the book looks absolutely amazing and I'll be buying it soon. Here's a link, if you're interested.

*First Haiti, then Chile. I am mindful of the fact that I live, literally, on a fault line. My home was built in the 40s. I hope to be able to find a sturdy doorway that will shield me...otherwise, please remember me fondly. (And may it not happen until both of my daughters are paramedics. I like to think of them as rescuers.)

*The Ogden Temple is going to receive a facelift over the next couple of years. I am ok with this, because the original design of the building has been totally botched, anyway. The architect designed the Provo and Ogden temples to be symbolic of the Lord leading the children of Israel out of Egypt. They were led with a "cloud by day" and "pillar (of fire) by night." The body of the temple's building itself was to represent the cloud, and the spire, which was originally painted gold, to represent the pillar of fire. Well, a couple of years ago a statue of Moroni was added to the spire, which was fine, of course, but THEY PAINTED THE SPIRE WHITE. Totally ruined it for me. I now look at the redesign pictures with anticipation. It's going to be beautiful.

Well, now that I spewed all of that, I feel better. Please feel free to agree or disagree. And have a fabulous March! I'm so glad we're done with January and February. Spring is in the air! My five-year-old said this morning, "Mom! The birds are back!"

So true- hallelujah, the birds are back!

Dear Fly Lady

2010-02-24T16:33:00.002-07:00

Dear Fly Lady;

This morning I did not get up and put on my shoes. In fact, I rolled out of bed, put on some sweats and didn't even manage a bra until noon. I didn't wash my face, therefore didn't manage to get moisturizer or even a little bit of makeup on. As for my hair, well, let's just say I look like Janis Joplin on a good hair day, and we all know she never had one of those.

I will say, though, that my kitchen looks fabulous. I shined my sink on Monday morning and it has stayed beautiful now for three days. The rest of the kitchen has followed suit, and tomorrow I'm shooting for cleaning up some hot spots.

Also, tomorrow, I will get dressed as soon as I get up, put on shoes, wash my face and put makeup on, and get things done at a reasonable hour.

Sincerely,

Nancy, the slob.

Horrible things are happening- am I allowed to be happy?

2010-02-02T12:35:00.000-07:00

The day I learned of the earthquake in Haiti, my stomach just fell. I looked at the images on my computer screen and wondered how on earth people ever pick up and carry on after that kind of horror.

I watched with pride as my church quickly sent relief planes and help was sent from LDS people across the border in the Dominican Republic. Certainly I don't mean to toot the LDS horn to the exclusion of the many, many other organizations that have provided help, I just was so proud to be part of a group that quickly offers compassion and help. I also have noted with extreme satisfaction LDS.org's main page, encouraging members worldwide to contribute however we can.

I saw images of bodies piling up, of mass graves, of crude burning pyres right alongside the streets, people pulled alive but broken from the wreckage, mothers grieving for lost children and children for parents, and it made my heart hurt. To know that the country suffered so horribly before the earthquake made the calamity seem like salt in an open wound.

The first day, I saw an outpouring of shock and grief. The days passed, and I noticed a shift. Supporting Haiti was becoming a political thing. People were angry at Hollywood for taking up the cause. I heard snide comments that President Obama only cared about the issue because the victims are black. I became very angry. Who cares if movie stars are helping people who are living through hell? It's not Haiti's fault. And when someone lifts a hand or donates money to make a life a bit better, where is the crime? How could this thing have possibly become political?

And then, I found myself thinking less about Haiti and more about my own life, my own problems. It's only natural, I know this. I would catch myself praying for things and then wondering how I possibly had the right to worry over little things when my Heavenly Father has other children who need him now more than I do. I suppose the beauty of God is that he can care for us all, and I know that, but I was reminded of how I felt after 9-11. I would laugh at something silly or find joy around me and then feel a twinge of something. Guilt? Probably it's guilt. A sense of sorrow for a moment that I'm finding joy and other people are living through unspeakable pain.

I remember when Saturday Night Live came back on the air after 9-11. It was a beautiful, welcome relief. It was done with love, with gentleness, it resurrected the knowledge for me that, even when horrible things happen, good still exists. We should grieve. We should help. We must do all we can to lift the hands and heads that hang low in hopeless agony. We must also cling to hope and joy and faith in a Maker who allows things to happen in this life, possibly to show the rest of us how to be humane, how to love and serve.

As I continued to watch attempted relief efforts in Haiti, and still do watch, I am reminded that, as the Proverb says, "Hope deferred maketh the heart sick." That we must cling to hope like it's all we have, and work as hard as we possibly can for the betterment of our own lives and those within our realm of influence. I know that the problems and trials in my own life, while in comparison to others may seem small, are still real and I can pray for help without feelings of guilt or inadequacy. I will keep it in perspective- one of my favorite quotes from Robert Fulghum is the notion that there are three kinds of lumps in life: a lump in the oatmeal, a lump in the throat, and a lump in the breast. I've learned to try to categorize the lumps and make sure I'm not acting as though I've a lump in the breast when really it's a lump in the throat that may not deserve as much attention as I'm giving it. And yet, the lump in the throat may still need a prayer or two, and it's ok.

My heart continues to ache for those who are suffering in Haiti, and everywhere in the world where unspeakable things happen that I know would test my faith and my sanity. History is replete with examples of hell on earth, and yet in those stories there are silver linings to the clouds, blessings from a benevolent God who sees all and loves all, and sometimes those blessings come through not only his angels in heaven but also those he has stashed here on earth. They are all around us.

I'm going to try to be an earthly angel. And to smile and feel joy and hope, even when things are bleak. The human spirit is resilient, and we are here to learn from the pain and find joy in the journey. So I answer my own question that, yes, even when horrible things happen, we are still allowed to be happy. I find comfort in that.

January- yuck

2010-01-28T08:57:00.002-07:00

As much as I try to begin each year with a sense of optimism and purpose, January does its best to beat me down. I enjoy fresh starts, I like reevaluating and setting new goals, I enjoy everything that a new year is supposed to be about. So why is January so hard?

Is it as hard, I wonder, for people who live in sunny climes? I keep thinking maybe it's the weather where I live, and I suspect it may have a lot to do with that. I live on the mid-northern end of the Wasatch Front in Utah, and inversion is in full swing this time of year. (That means a blanket of cold air and crap is trapped in the valley and I'm ready to start wearing a SARS mask.)

I'm looking out my window and I see dirty snow. When it's winter, I want it to be either in the act of snowing or I want to see a beautifully deep blue sky with sparkling clean snow on the ground and in the trees. I don't demand much, do I?

Isn't that just like life, though? (Here comes the meaningful metaphor.) Things aren't always perfect, they don't always appear as we'd like them to. The trick is to find joy in the journey. So, against my better instincts, I'm going to list things I do like about January.

1. The house seems nice and simple after putting away all the red Christmas clutter.
2. As much as I enjoy having my kids at home, it's nice to get back into a routine when they go back to school.
3. I like the thought of planning for a new year that's full of fresh possibilities.
4. When it snows, it's beautiful.
5. Getting through it feels like an accomplishment.

Ok, that's a really lame list, but it's better than nothing. :-) And now, sitting here at the end of January, I have Valentines Day to look forward to, and then by the first part of March, I'm usually feeling pretty good.

Is it just me? I should ask my Florida relatives if they have January blahs. Well, wherever you are, I offer a big woohoo that we've survived January and I wish you good things to come from here on out. :-)

Things I Learned in 2009

2009-12-27T00:08:00.002-07:00

These are some of the things I learned in 2009:

1. I am not perfect. I know! I was surprised too.
2. I can lose weight when I exercise and quit eating, like, 4,000 calories a day.
3. I like to exercise!
4. Too much sun really is bad for my skin.
5. I absolutely love my chosen careers. Writing and homemaking suit me well.
6. I love to cook.
7. I love to knit.
8. I love to kickbox. I know! I was surprised too.
9. My kids are growing up fast.
10. I fell in love with my husband all over again. 20 years look good on us.

These are a few of my favorite things...

2009-12-16T09:21:00.009-07:00

I have so much to be grateful for, and I try to acknowledge it daily to my Maker. However, there are small pleasures in life that round it all out and make it rich. These are some of my favorite little things.

I do love independent bookstores, but I have to admit, I LOVE THIS ONE, TOO!

Office supplies. I am such a nerd.

Next to the scriptures, this is the most helpful, mood-lifting book I've ever read.

Making tortillas. Mine aren't perfectly round, but I'm still working on it.

Love to knit. Love it, love it.

I was a happy girl when this magazine came back out of retirement.

These are the very devil. 400 calories for two, and of course I can't eat just one.

The worth of a soul...

2009-12-08T08:07:00.000-07:00

Last night I had the privilege of attending a fundraiser at my husband's school. He's a counselor for the Youth in Custody program, and the school decided to hold a fundraiser to raise money for a family in need this Christmas.

The students have been doing research for projects, writing papers on those projects and putting together slide shows that displayed images of their research with original text, all set to music.

There was a group of four brave students who sang, "Angels Among Us." They were wonderful, and I say "brave," because there were eight more who were supposed to sing with them. These four were awesome!

The students also made five quilts that were auctioned off. They were beautiful, and each one was purchased.

I was so touched at the work the kids put into their projects and the quilts. These children have experienced a slice of life I can only gape at, and I'm amazed at their resilience. They are working hard to succeed in a world that hasn't given then a very nice beginning. My hat is off to them--I am in awe of them and humbled by them.

My kudos also to the staff, who are talented, dedicated, and who must have loads of patience and use it often. Teaching is not an easy profession; I speak from experience.

I suppose I just want to say to this group of people, staff and children, and to teachers and students everywhere--nicely done. This life is not an easy one, and I do believe that as long as we help each other, we'll all get through it intact.

Happy Holidays to Project Surpass, and truly, God bless us, everyone!

Dreams

2009-12-02T21:26:00.001-07:00

Hold fast to dreams,
For if dreams die,
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.

--Langston Hughes

2009-10-22T14:02:00.001-06:00

You have a solemn obligation
to take care of yourself
because you never know
when the world will need you.

~ Rabbi Hillel

So inspiring

2009-10-09T13:12:00.005-06:00

So you probably saw Nienie on Oprah a couple of days ago. I loved it, loved hearing her talk, seeing her successes right there on the screen. She was poised, classy, as was her husband, Christian. What a sweet thing that this couple has let us into their lives, and that when I read her blog I am inspired to be/do better. I felt that before the accident when Amy told me about the blog, and then even more so since.

I think the thing I've taken most from watching this woman live her life is to slow down and enjoy the mundane, which really is a gift. I have a daughter on the cusp of graduating from high school and has dreams of moving on. I wish I had been more patient and aware of the moment when she and Anna were younger. I was just stressed all the time. I'm grateful to have had another chance with my son, to enjoy the moment and find beauty in the little things.

There are some tender mercies, despite a few regrets, however. I'm finding that Nina and Anna still need me. And that I still have chances to redeem myself- that the patience is just as hard to come by now as it was back then, and overcoming the urge to snap and be stressed is an accomplishment worthy of pride. Or at least chocolate or something.

Oprah touched on the sacredness of nurturing and doing the small things, like fixing meals, and truly, whether a mom is a stay-at-home or working, there is something so sacred about caring for those in her realm. It is an honor, though at times it doesn't always feel that way.

So my official thanks to Nienie and her family for allowing me to learn from them and to cherish the blessings in my life.

How can it be?

2009-09-24T22:03:00.003-06:00

It's amazing to me that this place:

Is also this:

a half a year later.

I love seasonal change!

Florida's prettiest lighthouse

2009-09-23T08:13:00.001-06:00

Ok, it's kind of a dorky picture that doesn't do the lighthouse justice, but I wanted a pic of all of us WITH the lighthouse. It's the Ponce de Leon lighthouse and is just down the road from the condo where we stayed. So, so beautiful. Gunder wanted to go inside, but we should have gone earlier in the day for that. Next time. :-)

Before and after

2009-09-21T08:07:00.001-06:00

Before the trip...

After the trip...

Notice I looked tired before we even left. I was so paranoid I'd forget something that I had made lists about checking my lists.

The beach was divine...

2009-09-17T08:22:00.000-06:00

Mmmmmm....Disney fudge!

2009-09-16T12:34:00.001-06:00

It's the BEST, Jerry. The BEST.

Mt Everest on the hottest day on earth

2009-09-14T13:48:00.000-06:00

Mark and the girls said it was the most awesome ride ever. Gunder and I went and played at the Bone Yard instead, but later we all posed here with the Everest ride in the background. It was so hot we were absolutely wilting, but it was the most fun family vacation, overall, we've had yet. :-)

Heaven!

2009-09-14T08:53:00.001-06:00

Just got back from a week in Florida with my little family and it was absolutely heavenly. We had such a good time. The kids were ready to be done and come home, but I think Mark and I could easily have stayed another week.

Pictures soon to follow!

Anticipation is always more fun

2009-09-01T00:19:00.001-06:00

It seems like I've been an avid anticipater my whole life. My personality profile suggests this about my preferred line of thinking: "What could be is always more exciting than what is." As a kid, the anticipation of any event almost eclipsed the event itself. Sometimes the buildup was so emotionally absorbing that the event almost felt anticlimactic in comparison.

I thought of the fun of anticipation the other night as I sat with some friends in my living room for Book Club. We read an old favorite, Pride and Prejudice, and had a good discussion. We also compared the book to the more prevalent movies released in recent decades. This led to a more general discussion about romance in books and movies, and one of my friends mentioned the fun of the buildup to that big kiss, the big embrace, the deliciousness of the tension and anticipation.

Remember when you were young and reading a book where the hero and heroine sat by each other, their fingers almost touching? Sometimes the simplest of gestures are the most satisfying. I remember being 13 and reading one of my beloved Trixie Belden books. Jim and Trixie HELD HANDS on a plane ride at the end of the story. Actually, she put her fist in his palm and he closed his fingers around it.

I was in absolute ecstasy. I must have read that book a million times for that scene alone.

I think there's a crucial element to a good love story that will work almost every time for me. Now, the fact that the book must be well written with compelling characters is a given. So ok, assuming those things are in place, the thing I want is tension. I want tension between the hero and heroine. By the time he finally takes her hand or they move in for that kiss, I want to be saying, preferably out loud, "Oh come ON already!" Make it worth my while. I want a story to be emotionally charged and the characters emotions to be deep and intense. I want the air around them charged and the passion intense with just a glance or a meeting of the eyes without a word even spoken.

Now, granted, I do not feel these things from reading Pride and Prejudice. The relationship between Elizabeth and Darcy is much more...subdued. At least on the page. My friend assures me that the Kiera Knightly version is much more grand and charged with love, drama and a fantastic music score. I have yet to see it myself, but it's on my list of to do's.

As a writer, I suppose my Ideal Reader would be the one who sighs at the end of my books, completely emotionally satisfied and fulfilled with the romance thing. My eternal quest will probably be to write the perfect book about the perfect romance that people will read again and again.

I suppose I should mention that my personality profile opens with this description: "If ever there was a personality destined to die for love, this is it."

Oy.

BTS Night

2009-08-21T08:32:00.001-06:00

Aw yeah. Back to School night for both my daughters. Mark went with Nina and I took Anna. (And Gunder. Doh.) We talked to teachers, noted the required supplies, walked the crowded halls and said hi to friends they haven't seen for three months. Part of me was excited for Anna, and the other part wanted to throw up. I really did like school, but the drama with friends and hoping people would like me and wanting to look perfect, etc etc came back with a vengeance.

In terms of Anna's classes, I found myself being excited for her. The geography teacher said she needs colored pencils because they do a lot of maps. Natch. Ok, I so would have been all over that. I have a weird affinity for both colored pencils and maps. The math teacher was really cool and I think it'll be a good match for my daughter, and the English teacher was one I would have loved having as a kid. And she has the kids write something every day!

They're writing every day!

I think this is one of the most valuable skills that helps students across the board. If you can read and write, success in multiple subjects is much more attainable than otherwise.

I'm reminded of the line in "You've Got Mail," where Tom Hanks tells Meg Ryan that he wants to buy "bouquets of sharpened pencils." Dork that I am, I love that. My favorite pencils ever are the Ticonderoga Tri Write. They are unbelievably sexy. Yes, I just said that about a pencil.

All things considered, as much as I will miss the freedom of summer, I am looking forward to reestablishing routine around here. I'm much more organized during the school year. Summer becomes a free-for-all.

To my sweet children, I wish you good luck and fabulous friends and good study habits. I hope that you'll learn many wonderful and useful things this year, and that your successes will be satisfying.

Better stop before I get all misty-eyed.

Danger, beware!

2009-08-18T01:00:00.000-06:00

"There's a danger in the word 'someday.'" --Henry B. Eyering.

I've been thinking a lot lately about the danger of Someday.

Someday I will take that trip. Someday I will actually ride that roller coaster. Someday I will learn how to sew something useful. Someday I will go back to school. Someday I will read that book sitting by my bedside. Someday I will be brave and befriend that new neighbor. Someday I will begin an exercise program. Someday, someday, someday...

The problem is that Someday often doesn't come. Someday doesn't make itself manifest until we create it. Oftentimes, the Somedays that we yearn for are secret longings of our hearts, things we don't tell another soul about but quietly wish we could or would do.

The problem with waiting is that none of us know how much time we're allotted here, and how sad would it be to get to the other side of life only to realize that while we did our best and what was required of us, we could have experienced a lot more, found much more enrichment and joy along the way.

Maybe I'm all introspective because I turned 40 last month and I'm now doing the whole Am I Where I thought I Would Be thing. Gratefully, I have accomplished much of what I envisioned when I was 18. I have waited, however, for other things that could have brought me joy much sooner.

For example, I've been a Someday I'll exercise person for years. I had a gloriously fast metabolism as a kid and then I hit 30. Oy. Those insidious pounds crept on one by one until I looked at myself in the mirror and wondered what had happened. Again, maybe because of the milestone birthday and maybe because I managed to lose a couple of pounds from a brief illness--whatever the reason, I decided to keep those few pounds off and begin melting away the rest.

I've exercised and eaten smart, and have lost roughly 20 pounds since May. My goal is another 20. It's gratifying to see real results and knowing it's coming because I'm working at it is that much more satisfying. Who knew I would come to look forward to jogging? I used to be winded climbing a flight of stairs.

Am I sounding like an infomercial for weight loss? I don't mean to. I just want to throw this out there, that I have a renewed sense of faith in our secret dreams. The only thing holding us back is ourselves. I know this to be true, because I've done it. I came across a quote the other day, and now I can't remember where I saw it, but basically it asked if we are hanging out in the rear mezzanine of life.

It hit me squarely. I don't want to be standing in the shadows of my own life. I don't want you to be standing in the shadows of your own life, either. Rabbi Zusya said, "If they ask me in the next world, 'Why were you not Moses?' I will know the answer. but if they ask me, 'Why were you not Zusya?' I will have nothing to say."

We are all unique, and we all have talents, some of the bizarre. Doesn't matter how weird or inconsequential we think they are; we have an obligation to ourselves and those in our realm of life to use those talents and pursue our secret dreams.

Take that class, go on that walk, take that vacation with your sister, do something carefree with your kids, read that book, write that book, learn to play that musical instrument, save a little pocket change for that silly froo-froo home decor thing you really want but don't really need. Love your family with abandon, their faults and all. Think of one good thing your spouse did for you last week and give him/her a big, fat kiss for it.

There is so much good in this world, and so many opportunities for us to do those things we want to, whether small or big. Beware of Someday and instead, reach inside to where you are uncertain or self-conscious. Rip that secret dream from its hiding place in your heart and put it down on paper. Smile.

Summer is fickle

2009-08-14T17:02:00.001-06:00

Or so my children are thinking. She comes in and the young ones think that summer will surely last forever. Then, she leaves and school returns, like the behemoth it is.

Hate to admit it, but I really did like the academic side of school. To this day I like sitting in a classroom and taking notes. I like to learn new stuff, put it into my own words, wonder how I'd transform the info into an essay... sick, I know.

My girls are registered and set to go back to school a week from Monday. I'm not looking forward to homework headaches, but I am glad they're moving on, getting older, becoming young adults. It's fun to watch the traits they had as little kids shift and morph into facets of their older personalities. Nina is only two years away from graduation, and Anna, four.

Where has the time gone? Day by day it drags, sometimes. Looked at in chunks of time, however, and I realize it goes so fast it's freaky.

At least Mark and I have Gunder to keep us young. He starts Kindergarten next fall.

Oy.

Simple Summer Favorites

2009-07-22T20:11:00.001-06:00

I do so love the different seasons. Really. Every time we go into a new season, I think of all the reasons why that one is my favorite. Then, just when I get tired of it, it's time for another one. Well, it's really, really hot right now where I live, but I'm still loving summer. I decided to make a list of ten of my favorite things about it:

1. popsicles
2. the farmer's market and fruit stands
3. our family garden and fresh veggies
4. my sister's pool
5. watching my husband swim in my sister's pool- he's like a fish.
6. green lawns
7. the smell of freshly-mowed green lawns
8. bar-b-ques
9. my little boy wearing only shorts and his tan tummy
10. my big girls and their tan shoulders, looking like I used to

(Ok, so number 10 is a little bittersweet. Give them a few years and a couple pregnancies and then they'll be envious of their own daughters).

But how about you? Do you like summer? What are some of your favorite things?

Sometimes the simplest times are the best

2009-07-07T13:25:00.001-06:00

This 4th of July, my family and I spent time with my sister who lives a block away from me. They recently moved to Ogden from Salt Lake, and the best bonus of all is her backyard pool. My husband has been cleaning and caring for it in a most dedicated fashion, because my sis and brother-in-law are not really what they call, "Pool People," but we definitely are. They said they'd not fill it in if we would help maintain it.

Done and done.

So we all hung out on the 4th, doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING MORE than swimming, sitting under the umbrellas, eating and visiting. We didn't go anywhere, buy anything other than food for the grill and some simple fireworks that we lit later in the street. (My favorite are the pagodas that spin and then pop up at the end. Sweet!)

My 4-year-old was even low-maintenance because with his water wing contraption keeps him afloat so well that he can toodle all over the pool and we don't have to worry about him drowning. Ok, we need to teach him to swim, but for now, it's awesome. The only downside to the day was that two of the five siblings and their families weren't able to make it. And my dad's recovering from some surgery so we let my parents miss this one. Other than these missing loved ones, the day was absolutely divine.

I found myself hoping my sister never, ever moves because when we're all old and gray with one foot in the grave, maybe, I still want to be able to go over to her house and hang out with the people I love. And to have no agenda?! Such bliss, I tell you! It was the best 4th I can think of; I loved every minute of it.

It's a good lesson for me. Simple is good. Makes me want to go through my house and create a minimalist palate. I know myself too well, though. Wouldn't be long before I'd have things cluttered about again. Then I'd just have to go through again a purge. Purge, collect, repeat. One eternal round, or something.

At any rate, I hope everyone who celebrates the 4th of July had a wonderful time, and my wishes to all that we make time to enjoy loved ones first and foremost.

Scribbling Teens

2009-06-09T23:53:00.001-06:00

Do you know any teens who like to write? I've started a new blog called Scribbling Teens that's aimed at helping kids figure out the writing process and learn as much as possible to help them along their paths to writerhood. (I know that's not a real word).

Anyway, if you know of anybody who might be interested, point them in my direction!

Thanks! :-)

Just because it's funny

2009-06-07T19:28:00.000-06:00

I'm not usually a fan of cutesy animal pictures, but this one makes me laugh.

I had the best Saturday! The Teen Writers Conference was wonderful! The kids were great, and I had such a good time. There are many talented kids out there. I was privileged to do the contest judging and coordinating and I was so, so impressed with the entries.

Massively good writing!

Have a good week, everyone. :-)

Someone made MY day!

2009-06-04T21:55:00.000-06:00

So Bookworm Nation totally made my day by posting that I made HER day! Here's the link- she says some really nice things about me and my books. It seriously makes me feel so good.

Thank you, thank you!!

Conference prep!

2009-06-04T00:15:00.001-06:00

I'm getting ready for THE Teen Writers Conference, which is happening this Saturday at Weber State. I'm finalizing my presentation and going over the contest entries, which have been so, so impressive. There are, I'm thrilled to say, some very talented writing kids in the world. In all, about half of the registered attendees entered the writing contest, and I happen to be in the know about the prizes. They are going to be uber cool.

So I'm old school- fighting the inevitability of the power point, (really, what's so bad about a white board and a marker? And the fact that the markers smell so good is an added bonus), and recruiting my husband and daughters to help. I know the mechanics of making the slides, putting together the presentation, but there's this little part of me that is waiting for the whole thing to crash on Saturday and then I'll have to punt.

With the whiteboard and a marker. Hmm. Who knew a crash could be a good thing?

Well, at any rate, I am so, so excited about this conference and the kids I'll get to meet. Kindred spirits, all of them, I'm sure. There's something about being with other people who love to do the same things you do. You can be as different as night and day, and yet there's a bond, an understanding. (You love pens and paper? Really? Me too!) I've loved reading and writing as long as I can remember. Only a fellow nerd would understand the delight of reading Nancy Drew and eating countless Popsicles in the back yard all summer long.

So to the kids I'll meet on Saturday, I give you a fond cyber-greeting in advance. You are now who I used to be. It's a good, good life. There is nothing more satisfying, for some of us, than writing. I wish you all the good things that a life of writing has to offer.

And perhaps the most important advice a writer can ever receive?

Read. And then read some more.

Can't wait to meet all of you!

Sob! I want it!

2009-05-29T00:57:00.001-06:00

I am so in love with this fabric! Check out Heather Ross, fabric designer, and scroll down to the Princess on the Pea piece.

Not sure what I'd do with it- maybe make a skirt or tote bag... or just stare at it, all folded up neatly and dream of what it could be...

Probably I'd drool all over it in a fabric-mania induced stupor and show it to my friend Amy, who would actually be able to do something with it.

Sans the drool.

Incredible- Sufjan Stevens

2009-05-27T00:32:00.001-06:00

Far and away the most beautiful version of this song I've ever heard. My thanks to Amy at Simply Mindful for including it on her playlist. :-)

I'll have to get me some frequent flyer miles.

2009-05-26T00:16:00.000-06:00

So my kids have grand dreams about where they want to live when they grow up.

Nina wants to live in Florida.

Anna wants to live in Greece.

Gunder wants to live with Optimus Prime.

The Adventures of Alex and Gunder

2009-05-20T23:04:00.000-06:00

This was a few weeks ago:

Poor kids were so, so tired. Alex and Gunder play very hard. And Nina stays up way too late at night. By the time she gets to the end of her school day, she's all but crawling.

I did the wise thing; I rolled down the windows and let them sleep in the driveway. Ah, sweet bliss. Anna and I ate chips and salsa.

THE Teen Writers' Conference

2009-04-27T23:24:00.000-06:00

Hey all- the following is an interview with Josi Kilpack, THE Teen Writers' Conference chair. I'm honored to be on the committee with her and am looking forward to this conference. It's going to be great, and if you know any kids aged 13-19, please pass the info along!!

NANCY: Tell us a little bit about yourself, Josi.

JOSI: I’m a mother of four, ages 15-7, and an author of 9 novels, with a tenth coming out in August. I have been a member of multiple writing groups, large and small, and a committee member and former conference chair for numerous writer’s conferences. In addition, I’m a frequent presenter to schools and groups, a fabulous cook (if I do say so myself) and amateur chicken farmer.

NANCY: You are the conference chairperson for an upcoming writers' conference for kids. Please tell us about the purpose of the conference.

JOSI: Several of the committee members and myself have been involved with putting together writing conferences for several years. We started small and have grown until our most recent conference had well over 250 attendants. Over the years we have had some teenagers attend our conference, and while they have enjoyed the experience, it seems to also be a bit overwhelming to walk into a two day, morning to night information-fest. So, we began discussing the idea of having a conference where the format, classes, and overall environment is created specifically to give kids, ages 13-19, the best overall introduction to writing conferences as well as instruction that will be most helpful to where they are now on their journey of being a writer. From there we started throwing out ideas and it really just rolled all together until we have this; THE Teen Writer’s Conference.

NANCY: What is your purpose for the conference? What do you hope the teens who come discover?

JOSI: Our hope is that the attendees will discover a lot of things, 1) that they are not the only kids that write, 2) that whatever goals or ambitions they might have in regard to becoming a writer are within reach, and 3) that it takes knowledge and time and concerted effort to accomplish those goals. Those of us on the committee, all of us being writers ourselves, have spent years honing our craft and are excited to help set these kids on that same path—perhaps earlier than we ever started.

NANCY: What kind of classes will you be offering?

JOSI: We will have classes that focus on actual elements of writing, as well as classes on book markets, the publishing process, and what they can do now to best prepare themselves for a future in writing. We have a variety of classes so as to appeal to both new and experiences writers.

NANCY: What if a teen would like to come, but is really shy? Will there be anything that will make him or her uncomfortable?

JOSI: Our entire focus and reason for putting this conference together is to create a comfortable place for young writers to come, learn, and flourish. We have been and will continue to put their comfort as our first priority because we know if they are intimidated and anxious, they will not benefit from this experience. However, we also expect them to be ready for this experience. Each youth, along with their parents, will need to determine if they are ready to be a part of this. Not all teen writers will be, and that’s okay. We hope to make this an annual event, so if this year won’t work, then perhaps by next year they will be ready.

NANCY: What is your overall goal for every youth that attends the Teen Writers' Conference?

JOSI: That they leave encouraged and inspired to do their best, to hone their craft, and to truly reach for the stars in regard to their writing and their life. We also hope they will make friends with one another and feel a sense of community among other writers their own age.

NANCY: How were you able to get such excellent editors and famous writers to attend?

JOSI: Well, in all humility I have to admit that they are my friends—my very good friends. We are like-minded people that saw a common goal and made it happen. I admire each and every person on this committee, and understand the sacrifice they each make to be a part of this. We are joined in this purpose as well as in our passion for great writing. I am blessed to rub shoulders with some of the best writers out there and the attendees get to benefit from that gift in my life.

NANCY: When is it and how do teens register?

JOSI: Registration is open for another 4 weeks. To register, attendees need to go to the website www.teenwritersconference.com and print off the registration form. Those attendees under the age of 17 will need parental permission to attend; then they will mail the completed registration, along with payment, to the address printed on the page. They, and their parents, will receive a welcome e-mail upon receipt of their registration as well as updates as the conference gets closer. Updates will also be posted on the website.

NANCY: Finally, this conference is for 13 to 19 year olds. Why that age group?

JOSI: We discussed this issue at length, and then simply decided since it was a TEEN conference, we would make it open to TEENS only. We feel that having them among their peers will help them relax and yet be willing to ask questions, meet other kids, and focus on the instruction we’re providing. For the older attendees, this will likely be a kind of introduction to adult-focused writer’s conferences, showing them what to expect and how the typical conference is organized. For the younger attendees, we hope they will come back year after year and continue learning about what they can do in the future.

NANCY: Any other information you'd like to share?

JOSI: We’ve had some parents express concern in regard to leaving their children at the conference without them. Again, this conference isn’t right for all teens, or all parents, but we do ask that parents consider the value of letting their children experience the independent nature of this conference. As a committee, we are dedicated to their safety and comfort; they will come to no harm while attending. And while we ask that parents stay clear of the conference rooms, there are many places on campus that are great for reading or getting some other work done if they worry about going too far away. We will also allow attendees to keep cell-phones on silent throughout the conference so that parents are only a phone call away. For those attendees without cell-phones, they are welcome to use a committee member's phone at any time.

NANCY: Where can people go to find more information, and especially to learn about the writing contest made available just for those who attend?

JOSI: www.teenwritersconference.com has all the details of the conference, contest, venue, etc. If something is not answered, there are e-mail links that will send you to us so we can give you the details you are looking for.

**And a final note from me- this is going to be so fun. What I wouldn't have given to have had something like this when I was a kid! I'm looking forward to it and am pleased to be teaching a class, myself!

Questions or comments? Check out the website or feel free to email me.

Sweet mercy, I've found me a gem.

2009-04-16T23:09:00.000-06:00

I like to look for blogs that I call "Soul Blogs," because I can go there for a quick lift regardless of my mood. One of those is, interestingly enough, Soule Mama. Another of my soul blogs is A Traveler's Library.

But NOW, dear reader, I've found a new soul blog. OH! Town Grab Bag is a blog by my friend and gifted writer, Penny Armstrong. She's blogging about Ogden goodies-- poignant, quirky and beautiful-- in Ogden. I've loved this place for years, and it's nice to see someone else share in the fun that is O-town.

Coincidentally, another friend of mine, Brian Nicholson, photo-journalist extraordinaire, has just finished a book called I Am Ogden. It's full of Ogden's quirky mix of people, past and present, (I'm even in it!) and it's so much fun. You should check out his site. It's awesome. Show up on Friday night, April 17, at the Union Grill, and you can buy the book and get 5 bucks off your dinner!

AH! Such a fine tributes paid to my hometown. I love it here.

You have got to check this out!

2009-04-15T23:48:00.001-06:00

Oh my GASH! Click on the link below, type in a title of a book-- pick a book, any book-- and then watch what happens! I'm a geek, I know, but WOW!

Amaztype

This is what we do for fun on Sundays...

2009-04-14T13:28:00.001-06:00

I know how long I'm going to live

2009-04-07T08:38:00.001-06:00

Ok, so I found this site that calculates your life span by considering health factors, age, weight and family history. It took me about a minute and a half to enter the info and voila, I'm going to live to 89.

Now, the factors I had against me are weight and family history. Can't do much about genetics, but I can lose weight, which I want to do anyway. That way, I'll live comfortably into my nineties, which, of course, we all want to do. What fun would it be to deny our children their God-given right to change our diapers?

Ah. The ultimate revenge. BwaHaHaHa!

Nefertiti airbrushed!

2009-04-01T22:24:00.000-06:00

My sister posted this on her blog, and I stole it. I'm steeped, right now, in Ancient Egyptian history and 19th Century Egyptology and archaeology for my second book in the Isabelle Webb series. I find this article completely cool! Can't you just hear them now, the ancient ones? "Oooh, no. My nose is all wrong. You're going to have to fix that." And the common folk probably said things like, "How are we expected to compete with expert sculptors? You know those perfect faces aren't real life. I say we love ourselves just as we are."

Anyhoo, I'm a geek, and apparently my sister is, too. ;-) I hope you enjoy this!

CT scan reveals hidden face under Nefertiti bust
By PATRICK McGROARTY – 1 day ago

BERLIN (AP) — Researchers in Germany have used a modern medical procedure to uncover a secret within one of ancient Egypt's most treasured artworks — the bust of Nefertiti has two faces. A team led by Dr. Alexander Huppertz, director of the Imaging Science Institute at Berlin's Charite hospital and medical school, discovered a detailed stone carving that differs from the external stucco face when they performed a computed tomography, or CT, scan on the bust.

The findings, published Tuesday in the monthly journal Radiology, are the first to show that the stone core of the statue is a highly detailed sculpture of the queen, Huppertz said.

"Until we did this scan, how deep the stucco was and whether a second face was underneath it was unknown," he said. "The hypothesis was that the stone underneath was just a support."

The differences between the faces, though slight — creases at the corners of the mouth, a bump on the nose of the stone version — suggest to Huppertz that someone expressly ordered the adjustments between stone and stucco when royal sculptors immortalized the wife of Pharaoh Akhenaten 3,300 years ago.

"Changes were made, but some of them are positive, others are negative," Huppertz said.

John H. Taylor, a curator for Ancient Egypt and Sudan at the British Museum in London, said the scan raises interesting questions about why the features were adjusted — but that answers will probably remain elusive.

"One could deduce that the final version was considered in some way more acceptable than the 'hidden' one, though caution is needed in attempting to explain the significance of these changes," Taylor wrote in an e-mail.

The bust underwent a similar CT scan in 1992. But the more primitive scanner used then only generated cross sections of the statue every 5 millimeters — not enough detail, Huppertz said, to reveal the subtlety of the carving hidden just 1-2 millimeters under the stucco.

Egyptologist Ludwig Borchardt discovered the bust in 1912 and added it to Berlin's Egyptian collection on Museum Island, a cluster of five neoclassical art halls that make up one of the city's most familiar landmarks.

Currently on display at the Altes Museum, the bust will move next door when the Neues Museum reopens in October after a lengthy restoration by British architect David Chipperfield.

In 2007, Wildung denied a request from Egypt's antiquities chief to borrow the bust for an exhibition, saying it was too fragile to transport. Huppertz said the results of his scan added credence to that claim.

Taylor, the British Museum curator, said the better understanding of the bust's structure will also help preserve it.

"The findings are particularly significant for the information they shed on the constructional process and the subsurface condition of the bust, which will be of value in ensuring its long-term survival in good condition" Taylor said.

On the Net:
http://radiology.rsnajnls.org
Copyright © 2009 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.

A change of blogular title...

2009-03-28T21:23:00.001-06:00

So here we are now at Nifty Nancy, a place for everything else in my life that isn't writing. I'm streamlining, after a conversation I had with my friend, Michele Ashman Bell, today. Time to get serious about this blogging stuff. ;-)

Healing

2009-03-25T08:15:00.001-06:00

I have a lot of favorite blogs. I look forward, every morning and throughout the day, to seeing updates and reading about people's lives and talents.

There are two blogs, however, that I've begun watching with a very close eye. One is Nienie's Dialogues. This is an incredible blog, written by a woman who, for a few years now, has amassed a following of readers who love her wit, humor, and love of life. She was in a plane crash with her husband last August, and she is just now getting to the point where she can post little snippets about her life to recovery. I have been like a watchdog waiting for her posts, as I know so many readers have been.

The other blog I've begun to watch closely, Savor Every Moment, is written by a friend of mine who recently lost her daughter under tragic circumstances. My own daughters adored this girl, and I have admired and respected this friend since meeting her some five years ago. She is an incredible woman who is experiencing a hell right now that I can only begin to imagine. My heart aches when I think of her, which happens often throughout my day. My friend is a gifted writer, as was her daughter, and the fact that she is occasionally willing to express her grief through her blog is something that humbles me and inspires me to stay close to a medium I love, even when times are painful and hard. Writing can be frustrating and hard and it is somehow also therapeutic. It is a gift, and one that she certainly possesses in spades.

So I watch these two incredibly strong women heal, one who has scars primarily on the outside, one on the inside. I ask myself why life has to be so incredibly hard sometimes, why such horrible things happen to such good, good people.

One of my favorite verses of scripture is found in Proverbs: Hope deferred maketh the heart sick. There are days when I cling to hope- I know we all do- and it is a beautiful, merciful gift. If one can grasp that hope, and hang on with the very fingertips, if necessary, there remains a little spark of light in the heart that makes it possible to see it through to the next hour, the next day, the next week. There have been a couple of isolated, very rare occasions in my life where I've experienced the temporary death of hope, and it is the darkest place I've ever been. I have come to realize what a tender mercy hope is.

So I wish for these two women the gift of continued hope, that when hope makes an exit, that it returns quickly. I wish for them that the arms of the Savior continue to enfold and comfort, love and strengthen as they move through their own painful healing journeys.

And I thank them, from the bottom of my heart, for allowing me to share in those journeys, that I might also learn something along the way.

And the winner is....

2009-03-22T23:28:00.001-06:00

PENNY!

I have to confess, it wasn't Gunder who helped me pick the winner out of the proverbial hat. It was Anna.

So Penny, let me know which book you want, and it's yours. I can't remember if you've read Isabelle...just drop me an email.

Congrats, and thanks to everyone for responding! I'll do another contest again soon, just because hey, it's fun, and it breaks up the monotony.

Have a good one!

My unofficial Breaking Dawn poll and a contest!

2009-03-19T07:44:00.001-06:00

It's my first contest! And a poll, which means if you lurk, now's the time to make a comment.

Here's what got me thinking about this. I am a Twilight series fan, but I admit I have yet to read book 4 in the series. It's a combination of being busy writing and hearing some lackluster reports about the book itself. My daughter is an avid fan of the series but didn't even finish Breaking Dawn. I plan to read the book because I want to form my own opinion about it. I do slightly regret not reading it as soon as it was released because now I've heard so many things about it that I wonder if I would have felt differently had I just read it fresh without any other opinions to color how I see it.

I've seen mixed reviews online, and some heated debates about the fourth book. I'll share some of the stuff I've seen after the poll, where I really do want to know what you think of the book and why.

Here's where the contest part comes in- respond to this post by Saturday, March 21 at midnight and I will put all the response names into a hat. My ever-helpful 4-year-old will draw one of the names and the winner will receive a copy of my most recent book, Isabelle Webb: Legend of the Jewel. Now, I know I'm no Stephenie Meyer, but hey, it's all I've got. ;-) If you've already read Isabelle, I have 8 other novels you can choose from.

So have at it- love it or hate it, let me know what you thought of Breaking Dawn!

Mormon writers in the Young Adult Genre

2009-03-17T11:12:00.001-06:00

This is a link to a really cool article found in the Boston Globe, March 1, 2009. It examines some of the reasons why Mormon writers seem drawn to the Young Adult/fantasy market. I thought the article was very respectful and objective. Not always easy to find these days when some people still think that mainstream Mormons practice polygamy.

I especially liked Shannon Hale's explanation of why she thinks that many Mormon readers embrace the fantasy genre and have no problem with books like Harry Potter, when other conservative faiths take issue with it.

Good stuff! Also, thanks to LDSPublisher, who posted the link in the first place.

Cover judging

2009-03-17T00:30:00.001-06:00

I know I've done it. I've judged books by their covers. And a good cover will practically have the book leaping into my hands. I think covers are so crucial to a book's sales.

Of all my books so far, there's only one that I thought was kind of lack-luster. As for a favorite- it's a tie between my second book, No Time for Love, and my most recent, Isabelle Webb. Mystery/romance is what speaks to me with both of these images.

Have you ever read or not read a book based solely on the cover?

Found this in my daughter's pics...

2009-03-15T22:54:00.001-06:00

Should I be concerned?

Happy Monday, everyone!

Always restless...

2009-03-13T07:59:00.001-06:00

So I left the St. Patrick's Day blog background up long enough to almost make it to St. Patrick's Day. Then I paid a visit to my cousin Nicole's blog and liked her background so much I had to copy it. It's still green and very spring-like, so that counts for something.

Speaking of spring, we're supposed to hit 70 degrees here in O-Town next week and I am absolutely thrilled. I'm done with winter. We're going to plant a big garden in my parents' backyard this summer because our yard is the size of a postage stamp with soil like Pet Semetary. I'm sure the garden will resemble the picture above. I'm all excited to make my kids weed and care for Mother Earth. It will make them responsible.

Also, in tribute to my late grandfather, Sidney Campbell, I'm copying a poem I found at Cousin Nicole's blog. Someone found it in his papers. (I say "someone," not trying to be insensitive, but there were 10 kids- my dad is #8 and Nicole's mom #9, and there are umpteen million grandkids and great-grandkids, so it could have been any of a number of people). My guess is Aunt Kathleen.

BOOK HOUSE

I always think the cover of a book is like a door Which opens into someone's house where I've not been before.
A pirate or a fairy queen may lift the latch for me.
I always wonder when I knock, what welcome there will be.
And when I find a house that's dull, I do not often stay
But when I find one full of friends, I'm apt to spend the day.
I never know what sort of folks will be within you see.
And that's why reading always is so interesting to me.
~~Annie Fellows Johnston

Confession: I really want one!

2009-03-11T00:01:00.001-06:00

I can't believe I'm even admitting it! I love, love books. I love owning them, holding them in my hands, writing all over them and keeping my favorites. I never thought I'd see the day when I would actually want an electronic reading thingie. This one is the Kindle 2, and it can all but fly you to the moon.

But this is so cool! Download entire books in nothing-flat! Someone tells you about a great book- say no more, download it now!

And yet...I will always love the act of walking through a bookstore on the hunt for something really good.

This will be yet another part of life I'll learn to balance. I'll always love the old-fashioned book. Yet, this cool, sleek new toy is just too yummy to resist. Someday I'll own one. And in the meantime...I'll keep flipping pages.

What about you? Preferences?

Oh man, I dare you not to smile!

2009-03-09T23:38:00.001-06:00

Can't decide what to wear?

2009-03-06T23:58:00.001-07:00

I must admit, there are mornings when I feel like this.

Sans the cigarette. Natch. Ah, Mickey Rourke, what's happened to you?

I love things that make me laugh out loud!

2009-03-04T23:27:00.002-07:00

I found this at Charlotte Andersen's blog. Go there! She's awesome.

Hey, it's March!

2009-03-01T00:27:00.001-07:00

Had to change the blog background in honor of St. Patrick's Day. I lasted, what, 2 weeks with the plain background? That's a record for me. :-)

Have a wonderful first week of March, everyone!

You Go Get Your Palace

2009-02-25T22:54:00.001-07:00

One of my favorite movies is Cool Runnings. It's about the first Jamaican Bobsled team and I really like the actors who played the four main parts, along with John Candy, their coach.

In one scene, one of the characters, whose name is Yul Brenner, dares to mention his dreams and he holds up a picture. He says, "I'm going to live there." Another character, Sanka, laughs himself silly at the picture because it's a photo of Buckingham Palace. So Yul gets all embarrassed and crumples the picture. A third character, Junior Bevil, retrieves the picture and straightens it out. He gives it back to Yul and says, "Go ahead Yul Brenner. You go get your palace."

I love that part of the movie the best. (I hope I've remembered everything more or less correctly. It's been awhile since I've seen it). Many times when I've been discouraged or ready to throw away a silly dream, I remember that line.

Makes me also think of Langston Hughes:
Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die,
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.

That's poetry I can wrap my brain around.

Writerly Encouragement

2009-02-25T08:05:00.001-07:00

Long, long ago, in a mindset far, far away, in the days before I was published, I used to lap up positive writing quotations and stick them on the wall by my computer. Once I'm published, I used to think, I'll be over this insecurity.

Well, guess what. That mindset isn't really far, far away. I still grab onto positive thoughts regarding writing and publication because it's never a sure thing, especially in the market right now. What is a great career now can change on a dime if you're not careful.

One of the best quotes I came across was from Anne Rice. I think I found it in either a Writer's Digest or maybe online somewhere. I didn't write the source down and I wish I had. At any rate, this is it:

"...[People who write have to] a)believe in themselves totally, b)work like demons and c)ignore the rejections.
When you mail out a transcript, you are not turning in a paper for a grade. You can mail out a perfectly wonderful and publishable novel and then have it rejected 10 times. And the reason it's rejected is because you hit 10 different people who, for various reasons, don't want to work with this idea. You have to keep going. You have to never interpret rejection as a failing grade. They are not failing grades. they mean almost nothing...I kept writing and kept mailing out. My attitude was, 'I'm going to become a writer.' I was a writer."

And that's Anne Rice! Like her or not, you must admit the woman tells an amazing story and has done really, really well with it. The fact that, for me, this advice came from such a credible source was a real kick of inspiration.

I'm not sure how many writers read this blog, but if you're out there and wondering if your work will ever see the light of day, take heart! It's possible, it's doable, you just cannot, cannot quit. You hone the art, you perfect it, you polish and scrub it, you get objective, kind feedback, you work and work and work.

I love that billboard that has a pic of Edison on it. The quote is, "After the 10,000th try, there was light." Good thing he kept at it, or we'd all still smell like kerosene.

The View From My Front Door

2009-02-18T23:19:00.001-07:00

In the winter, on days like this, I think the scene can't possibly get any prettier.

And then, spring comes. I look outside and think the scene can't possibly get any prettier. Then summer, everything is so green! And I think the scene can't possibly get any prettier. Fall comes, ushering in a break from the insane heat, the leaves on the tree turn colors and my entire front yard is enveloped in a golden glow. And I think the scene can't possibly get any prettier.

I do love seasonal change. Each has its own beauty.

Good Times in the Snow

2009-02-18T07:52:00.001-07:00

So Anna and Gunder built a snowman. Well, Anna built the snowman. Gunder coached and made snow angels. Then he wanted to tackle the snowman, but we told him we had to wait until Dad came home and saw it, first.

Dad came home, but Gunder's snowsuit was still soaked. So rather than put all the wet stuff back on, we decided it was a good idea to just pose beside the snowman. Maybe we'll tackle it in a few days.

Wacky Internal Clock!

2009-02-16T22:15:00.001-07:00

"Go to bed. Whatever you're staying up late for isn't worth it."-- Andrew Rooney

I have been a night owl ever since I can remember. I could happily sleep every morning until at least 10:00 and still get up feeling flu-like. The problem is that I get a second wind at night time and then in the morning I wake up feeling like I've been hit by a truck.

Every morning! No matter what time I go to bed, really! Come to think of it, I can't blame the second-wind thing!

My dad, however, wakes up before his alarm at 5 a.m. He hits the ground running, literally, (well, now he cycles), and feels all kinds of snazzy. Kharma does come back around, though, and no good early-to-riser goes unpunished, because by 10 p.m. he's out for the count.

Why are we all so different? I even grilled my friends at our last card-making broo-haha. "Are you an early riser? What's your secret? How do you do it?" Somebody, please help me feel human in the morning!

My friend Jewels suggested I take a multi-vitamin before bedtime, which I have yet to try. I'm ducking my head in shame. My mother would say, "You haven't tried it? Then you must not be very tired." When we were kids and hungry for some midday snack, she'd offer something we'd think was totally stupid and then she'd say, "Well, you must not be very hungry, then." (You know what's funny? I now use it on my kids. "What do you mean you're cold? Go put on a sweater. You don't want to? You must not be very cold, then.")

Well, I've resigned myself to the fact that I will probably live each day of my life feeling like death in the morning. It's ok, really. I'm usually somewhat human by noon.

My hero

2009-02-15T20:58:00.001-07:00

"I leave you, hoping that the lamp of liberty will burn in your bosoms until there shall no longer be a doubt that all men are created free and equal." --Abraham Lincoln

And *sigh* Mark said he couldn't read my blog because it was too cluttered. I'll see how long I can stand the plain.

And in honor of Valentine's Day...

2009-02-14T11:46:00.001-07:00

"Is not this the true romantic feeling--not to desire to escape life, but to prevent life from escaping you?" -Thomas Wolfe

Truthfully, sometimes I'm desperate for life to not escape me, and other times I'm wishing it would just keep flying by so I can reap my eternal reward for sticking it out.

I love the days when I feel like I've got life by the throat and want to accomplish everything under the sun. Oddly enough, (or not oddly enough, if you ask my parents and grandparents), I'm happiest when I'm productive. Nice as it would be to sit around and do nothing but eat chocolates, (or chips and salsa), I feel such supreme satisfaction at having cleaned a horribly messy room or written thousands of words.

It's all about balance. That's kind of my life philosophy. Too much of any one thing leaves us lopsided. Everything in life requres balance, love included. Too much love and you're an obsessive stalker. Not enough love and you have damaged relationships.

Since it is Valentine's Day, I hereby give a shout-out to my husband. He makes me laugh, and always has. It's one of the things I love the most about him. When his sense of humor runs out, I'm kicking him to the curb. We're coming up on our 20th anniversary and I want him to know that it really does feel like it's flown by.

There's a quote whose source I can't remember, but in essence it's this: Eternity can be a long time, but with the right person, it's not long enough.

I'm glad I've signed on with someone who makes me laugh, or eternity would be long indeed.

I love you. :-)

I'm a Finalist!

2009-02-09T21:42:00.001-07:00

Woohoo! The list for the Whitney Award finalists is out and I'm on it!

I've never really understood how people could honestly say, "Oh, it's such an honor just to be nominated!" but now I do. Isabelle Webb, Legend of the Jewel is up for an award in the historical category and I'm in some really good company. I can honestly say that even if my book doesn't win, well, wow- I was up against some really good stuff.

The Whitney Awards are going to be held on April 25th in Provo. Yummy food, good company, lots of laughs- I'm sure it will be a night to remember.

And truly, I'm honored.

How I Became a Writer

2009-02-06T22:00:00.001-07:00

You know, I started this blog with the intention of using it to connect with readers and people who are interested in writing, and I've realized that lately I've talked very little about books or writing. So I decided to give the brief version of my writing history.

Loved to read and scribble as a kid. My idea of a good time in the summer was a Nancy Drew book and a popsicle in the back yard. My sisters will agree with me, this was great. Our husbands find us particularly pathetic. But I so loved to read.

Fast forward to me graduating from college and giving birth to our first daughter. My husband and I spent just under a year in Atlanta and I had been reading a time-travel romance. I missed my family terribly and decided that I wanted to start writing a story about a Civil War time-travel to divert my thoughts. Well, interestingly enough, my husband decided he wanted to go back to Utah to finish school and we've been here ever since. (I like to remind him that it was his idea to return whenever he pines about missing the east coast. He's from Florida).

So I began the book in Atlanta on a computer that was as big as a coffee table and had a word processing program that couldn't keep up with my speedy typing. I had to pause every few minutes to let it catch up. (These fingers are strong! I learned to type in 7th grade on a manual typewriter. Computer keyboards are like warp speed in comparison).

I kept working on the book when we returned to Ogden, Utah, but put it away at intervals, thinking it was just a waste of time. When we got a new computer with a fancy dial-up internet connection, I became involved in a wonderful world of writers and readers. I received encouragement from friends I'd never met in person and decided to finish that book.

I did some local research, reasoning that I had a better chance at publication if I tried a local market first. The big players at the time were Deseret Book, Bookcraft and Covenant. A lot of fiction I spied on shelves at bookstores came from Covenant, and as it happened, when I finished the book and mailed it off to those three pubs, Covenant was the company that accepted it and I really feel that I landed in a very good place for me.

I've since published 8 other titles with Covenant. In fact, by the time the first book was finally accepted for publication, I had already almost finished the sequel. There were four romantic adventures at first, followed by a series of four Civil War volumes. My ninth book came out last fall and is a mystery/adventure/romance set in 1865 India.

All told, I love to write so much. I can't pick a more perfect career for myself. Someday I'd love to do postgraduate studies in writing or literature, but for now, I am so content. I love, love what I do. I also hate what I do. Writing is hard, and there are so many reasons not to sit down and write. But once I do, I get absolutely lost in another world and I'm always amazed at what appears on the screen.

When people tell me they've always wanted to write, I tell them to sit down and do it. That's the hard part. Once you have something on the page, you can tweak it, edit it, delete parts, add to it, whatever. Write for the joy of putting another world on the page/screen. Write to escape. Write to learn. Write to leave memories for yourself or your kids. Just write something! It's such an amazing form of self-expression. Sometimes I look back on journal entries and think, "Ok, I am a complete and utter dork." Other times, I laugh and think I'm pretty funny.

What I wouldn't give to have something from my grandmothers and great-grandmothers-- their journals, letters, something. These women are a part of my life because I often imagine channeling them to help me with problems or issues. I picture them with me, and I'd love to have a written account of what they did, how they lived. I'd even love to read something fictional they'd written, because you can see a person through the writing, even if it's "pretend."

So I rambled a bit, but that's the start of my writing story in a nutshell. Now my challenge to you is to pick up a pen or start a new file on your computer. Start writing something. Anything. Truth or fiction, scary or funny, memoir, short journal entry, ANYTHING. Your grandchildren will thank you. And if you don't ever want anyone to read what you wrote, well, that's ok too. Keep it for yourself. You'll be amazed at what comes out.

Distinctive Voices

2009-02-03T12:15:00.001-07:00

Just sitting here listening to a little Fleetwood Mac and thinking that I'd know Stevie Nicks' voice anywhere. There are some voices like that- you recognize them right off the bat because they're so unique.

A few more that come to mind: Freddie Mercury, Barbara Streisand, Britney Spears, (much as I dislike her voice), Steve Perry, (until you hear his replacement for Journey, which sounds just like him!), Celine Dion, Elvis, (of course- and I can't stand his voice!)...

Ok, this list was way long longer in my head when I started this post and now I'm drawing a blank. You know what I mean, though. The kind of voice you hear in a new song and you don't have to ask who the artist is.

I'm probably un-American to admit to not liking Elvis. I do like Frank Sinatra, though, so that counts for something. (Sending pleas for forgiveness heavenward to my grandfather who thought Sinatra was a not-talent hack. We're not Italian, though, we're Scots. Maybe that's the difference. Had my grandfather been Italian, it would have been in the blood. I mean, can you be Italian and not like Frank Sinatra? I should think that would be morally reprehensible or something. Somehow defiling a natural law of the universe).

I'm a freak!

2009-01-31T17:58:00.001-07:00

I couldn't stand the red background anymore. When I looked away after reading the text, I saw nothing but lines before my eyes.

Forgive the ADD! If I were really professional, I'd pick a background and never change it until I die.

But that would be boring. ;-)

The end of a swimming season

2009-01-30T18:28:00.001-07:00

My daughter swam in Region finals today and I couldn't have been more proud. She worked so hard this year to keep on top of her grades and has been dealing with a lung issue we hope to soon have diagnosed. The meet wasn't quite what she would have wanted in terms of her times, but she was there and I was so, so proud.

Now, getting there was a journey in itself. For me, today, I mean. I now am babysitting my nephew, one-year-old Alex, and I have my four-year-old, Gunder, still at home. I figured if we left the house by 1:00 I'd make it to Bountiful by 1:45 to see Nina swim her last event. I had a funny internal dialog going on, sometimes peppered with comments from the two rugrats.

Me: Have to hurry. Got the bottle, drink for Gunder with lid, Cheerios in cup, diaper. Dang. Need wipies. Ok, got the wipies. "Gunder, stop with the jumping up and down! Put your shoes on!"

Inner voice: Patience is a virtue.

Me: Shut up. Ok, set the alarm, out the door. Buckle everyone in, no movie for Gunder. "Sorry, Gunder, no movie. You'll just have to listen to the radio. No, I'm not going back in." Listen, kid, my head's going to explode if you don't stop the whining about the movie.

Inner voice: He's only four.

Me: Again, with the shut up. What is with all this blasted traffic? Who's so desperate to get out of Ogden at 1:00 on a Friday? Does nobody work a full day anymore? My day goes till midnight! I never have an early day. Wish someone would offer me four tens.

Inner voice: Idle hands are the devil's workshop.

Me: I'll give you idle hands. Ok, finally moving. Good. Going faster. Passing Lagoon.

Gunder: "I see the roller coaster!"

Alex: "Aaaaarrrgggghh."

Gunder: "I dropped my Megazord!"

Me: "You'll have to leave it, buddy. I can't reach it."

Gunder: "Please, Mom! It's just right there."

Me: (Reaching and driving with one hand), "There. Now don't drop him again!"

Inner voice: You should keep both hands on the wheel. Isan't their safety more important than Megazord?

Me: Isn't my sanity more important than anything at all? Who wants to listen to him whine about Megazord until we get there. Do you want to listen to him whine about Megazord till we get there? Ok, making ok time...phone ringing, it's Anna. "Yes, we're almost there." Driving kind of fast...hmm. The car shimmies a bit at 80.

Inner voice: Old Arab saying, Do not stand in places of danger praying for miracles.

Me: Crap. And I did pray before I left the driveway. Front tire is kind of bald. Slowing down, darn you.

Inner voice: You should slow down more. We believe in being subject to kings, rulers, (something) and magistrates and in obeying, honoring and sustaining the law.

Me: Some laws were meant to be broken. There are places in the world where this speed would be considered crawling. Again with the phone. "Yes, honey, I swear I'm almost there." Ah, good. There's the exit. And pulling up to a stoplight. Ok, good, got the green arrow. Checking watch. She'll be in the pool in four minutes. What? are you kidding me? A school zone with no kids and not even a crossing guard in sight. But the lights on the sign have been turned on. Blasted kids.

Inner voice: Suffer the little ones to come unto me and forbid them not...

Alex: Aaaaarrrrrrgghh!

Gunder: Mom, he's touching me.

Me: Ok. Parking lot. Oh look, there's Anna.

Anna: "Mom, are you just going to park right here?"

Me: "Yes. The snow covers up the yellow paint on the curb. Besides, there are two other cars right there."

Inner voice: Would you follow them off a cliff?

Me: At this point, yes. And didn't I tell you to shut up?

So, needless to say, the Inner Voice needs to work on her articles of faith. And she's annoying. And she always pops up when I'm the most stressed.

The good part of the afternoon was that I saw Nina's second race, and saw her get a medal. I saw her hug her dad and get teary-eyed on his shoulder- this, the girl who rarely cries. I saw my teddy bear of a husband get teary-eyed. This, the man who always does, bless his heart. He has been in love with his girls from the moment they took their first breaths, and as I watch him try to let go as they get older, my heart breaks a little for him, even as I laugh gently with him. Well, kind of with him. He's not laughing much.

My friend Jerelyn gave a talk recently where she was honored for Good Works. She said when she goes to bed each night, she thinks, "What was the best part of my day today?" and "What was my good deed today?" Well, I suppose my good deed for the day was not ramming my dinged-up SUV into the cars in my way as I frantically tried to see my daughter's race, and the best part of my day was watching Nina's face as her dad told her how proud he is of her and how much he loves her.

I hope I never forget that moment.

Wit

2009-01-26T23:13:00.001-07:00

"Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she has laid an asteroid."

--Mark Twain

I love that.

Last week of January!

2009-01-25T19:45:00.001-07:00

Aw yeah! We've almost survived the most dismal month of the year! Of course, some of you probably love January. I limp through it. ;-) I know, fresh start and all that.

My friend, Norman Vincent Peale, helps me through the hard times. One of my favorite quotes is from a book which is a collection of some of his most favorite writings through the years. The book is How To Be Your Best. He talks about the fact that although there are billions of us living now and in the past, no two of us are alike.

"Almighty God put a personality in you, different from any other He ever made. And He means for you to bring it out, to let it loose. Be yourself." He also says he would say to himself, "I am different; I have a job to do in this world. And if I do not do it, it will never be done."

So here's to all the things that we each are charged with doing! No, we can't all cure infectious diseases or end starvation, but each of us has a small realm, and within that realm we can do lots of little things during the course of a day that add up to big things when you look at them over a lifetime.

And nyah to you, January! Take that!

Provident Book Club Night!

2009-01-23T17:15:00.001-07:00

Sandra, Candace, Me

Last night I went to Provident Book/Humdinger Toys in Pleasant Grove. The ladies in that book club read Isabelle Webb: Legend of the Jewel for their first book club selection ever! I was so flattered to be there and had such a good time chatting with the ladies.

Eileen, Me, Tristi

This store is just so much fun. I highly recommend a visit if you're ever in the neighborhood. The address is 661 W State, Ste A, Pleasant Grove, UT. Click here for their blog and Karlene's post on the bookclub.

Karlene, Me

Thanks, everyone, for such a fun night!

Words of Wisdom

2009-01-22T12:22:00.001-07:00

"Rather than dwelling on the past, we should make the most of today, of the here and now doing all we can to provide pleasant memories for tomorrow."

--Thomas S. Monson

It's easy to get caught up in the "if only I'd," or "I wish I would have," mode of thinking. "I can't believe s/he felt/said/did that to me..." Sometimes we need to let go of all of that and live in the present. I know that thinking/dwelling too much on past pains can bog us down really fast and hold us there if we let it.

The quote above is from a Thomas S. Monson talk called "Finding Joy in the Journey," and it's full of good stuff. One particular paragraph states, "This is our one and only chance at mortal life--here and now. The longer we live, the greater is our realization that it is brief. Opportunities come, and then they are gone. I believe that among the greatest lessons we are to learn in this short sojourn upon the earth are lessons that help us distinguish between what is important and what is not. I plead with you not to let those most important things pass you by as you plan for that elusive and nonexistent future when you will have time to do all that you want to do. Instead, find joy in the journey--now."

I come from an impressive line of worriers. Combined with my Myers/Briggs personality profile which pegs me as an ENFP who thinks what could be is always more exciting than what is, it makes for a pretty schizophrenic person. I worry, or I think of what could be. The reminder to enjoy the here and now is really good for me.

There's an awesome quote in Kerry Blair's Counting Blessings. She speaks of the Mary/Martha "careful and troubled about many things," (if memory serves- I don't have the book right in front of me. It's on my nightstand). Kerry's quote is, in essence, "if you must be careful, be careful not to borrow trouble." That hit me like a ton of bricks. I'm often a borrower of trouble.

The whole message of finding joy in the journey is such a valuable one. It really isn't all about the destination. I love reminders of that because it allows me to take a deep breath, smile and appreciate the details along the way that make life so rich.

Joy in the journey

2009-01-21T12:16:00.001-07:00

"Whatever hour God has blessed you with, take it with grateful hand, nor postpone your joys from year to year, so that in whatever place you have been, you may say that you have lived happily."

--Horace

Getting political for a moment...

2009-01-20T15:41:00.001-07:00

So I don't usually step up on a political platform. Well, I kind of did with the Civil War series. Tried to be objective, but my emotions came out through Emily Birmingam. Anyway, I've thought a lot about that series this morning, and here's why.

When I finished Faith of our Fathers, I was emotionally exhausted. I was disheartened that history shows so many good people allowing something perverse to exist in this country for so long. Even then, the people called slavery a "peculiar institution," and indepth research about it and the war itself made for one sad writer.

I wasn't sure I'd ever see the day when this nation elected an African American president. It took 100 years after the Civil War ended to see an effective Civil Rights movement. 100 years! And this morning, some 50 years later, I witnessed history.

I was grateful to hear the inaugural invocation. Rick Warren is a California preacher of some controversy, depending on who you ask and on which side of Prop 8 you fall on, but it was nice to hear a prayer delivered on behalf of the people asking for humility, wisdom, forgiveness and blessings. Despite the divinely inspired separation between church and state, I love that I heard someone petition our Father for help on behalf of an entire hopeful, weary nation. It was a decidedly Christian slant, especially ending with the Lord's prayer, but I sincerely hope it will be received by all as the gesture of faith that it was.

One of my favorite passages from his prayer:

"Help us, O God, to remember that we are Americans, united not by race, or religion, or blood, but to our commitment to freedom and justice for all. When we focus on ourselves, when we fight each other, when we forget you, forgive us. When we presume that our greatness and our prosperity is ours alone, forgive us. When we fail to treat our fellow human beings and all the earth with the respect that they deserve, forgive us. And as we face these difficult days ahead, may we have a new birth of clarity in our aims, responsibility in our actions, humility in our approaches, and civility in our attitudes, even when we differ."

Now before you get all up in arms and post nastygrams to me saying that the Civil War was about more than slavery, I already know all that. I also still maintain that there was only one issue divisive enough to rip this country in half, and it happened when Lincoln was elected, having made his views on slavery clear. Race has been an issue in this country since its inception and the fact that we are now seeing such diversity in leadership and, indeed, in the highest post in the land makes me feel warm inside.

Regardless of what happens in the future, for now, I am hopeful. May our Father bless us all.

Oh! And a couple more things...

2009-01-19T23:43:00.001-07:00

First, my darling son.

Secondly, my darling, weird daughters.

And thirdly, a really cool review of Isabelle Webb: Legend of the Jewel on Meridian. Forgot to post it when it went up! (And yes, Jennie is my friend, but she's also very objective. I didn't pay her one red cent!)

Win a Book!

2009-01-19T22:09:00.001-07:00

I love easy contests! Jennie Hansen, my friend and extremely gifted author, is hosting a contest at her site. Simply respond to any of her blogs between now and the first of February and she'll enter you in a drawing to receive a copy of her new book, High Country.

Click on the link! Even if you don't win, you'll find yourself at a really cool blog.

Resolutions?

2009-01-04T15:34:00.001-07:00

Between lots of family activity and Christmas itself, I haven't blogged for ages. And when I thought of all the things I should do this year, I got entirely too overwhelmed.

This will be short and sweet. I'm stealing from a comment on the V blog made by Jennie Hansen, whom I admire enormously. She mentioned that she tackles one day at a time, one mountain at a time, rather than get overwhelmed with massive New Years Resolutions.

In fact, here's her actual quote. "I don't make resolutions either, a whole year is too long of a goal for me; I work with shorter goals better, the climb this mountain today, then I'll think about tomorrow's mountain kind of goals."

I can't tell you how liberating it was for me to read this! I'm so relieved. Because there are some days when one day at a time is all I can think about. I'm probably not alone in this.

I wish you all the very best a fresh new year has to offer, and here's to getting through January! Bleah.

Cherished Traditions

2008-12-13T23:15:00.001-07:00

Tonight we went to downtown Ogden to see the lights. The Christmas Village is growing and is a whole lot bigger with more displays than when I was little. It was fun to see the whole thing through my 4-year-old's eyes. As we drove down the hill and all the lights came into view, he said, "I'm so glad we're going to Christmas Town!" He even got to ride the train around the block.

Then we went to my parents' house and had Norwegian pancakes and the annual viewing of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. Well, by then it was a little late and we just saw the first part where Clark takes his family out to find the perfect Christmas tree. And it's just as well, because we'd have had to skip parts for the kids- you're better off watching the t.v. version if you have young-uns- but it was fun because it's a tradition, and as wacky as some traditions get through the years, they're still comfortable. They're still home.

We have a few holiday movies that are must-sees. A Christmas Story is number one on the list, despite the fact that my daughters aren't really fans. (Boggles the mind. How can you not like that movie?) My parents and husband and I enjoy It's a Wonderful Life, but my siblings and children hate that one, too. My dad has a tradition of stashing himself away in a vacant room on Christmas day and watching it by himself. My youngest sister found out he did that and was all kinds of distraught, thinking it was tragic that my poor dad watches that sad movie all alone on Christmas day. (Like he's in there sobbing into his bowl of popcorn, "Oh, no, George Bailey, no! You have so much to live for!") In reality, my dad is so glad to get away for some much-needed alone time that he's kicking his heels in unabashed glee.

My kids and I love Elf. That's already become a Christmas movie tradition for us, and I also like The Grinch, both animated and Jim Carrey. Then there are the old- time kids shows, like Rudolph, (which used to give me nightmares and make me throw up as a kid, what with the scary Abominable Snowman and all), Frosty the Snowman, and the 70s cartoon, Twas the Night Before Christmas. (There's a certain person of some significance in my stake who resembles Joshua Trundle, but I won't say who).

Such good stuff, and all the more fun because there are a few select weeks during the year when it's acceptable to watch them. Perhaps that's why I love them so much. They herald in the season for me, and they're a treat. Now all I need is a James Bond Christmas Special. Ah, then life would be complete. :-)

Cherished Traditions

2008-12-13T23:15:00.000-07:00

Maslow really knew his stuff

2008-12-05T13:11:00.001-07:00

So I've been sick for two weeks and am finally feeling like I'm back among the living. Cyberspace has sped right along without me, and the inboxes are stuffed full.

But feeling under the weather has made me appreciate Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs all the more. Man, that guy was really on to something when he came up with his triangle. (Actually, he built on the work of Skinner and others before him, but anyway. The Hierarchy of Needs was his own creation).

So at the base of the triangle, you have your physical needs. In order to build upward and appreciate other facets of life, one first has to have those physical needs met. After the physical comes safety, then love, then self-esteem and finally self-actualization where we reach the pinnacle and find our full potential.

Mmm hmm.

Some of us are still on the lower levels, but hey, it's all part of the game, right?

So anyway, I was sick over Thanksgiving. THANKSGIVING. What a waste! So much fantastic food and I barely enjoyed it. I did force myself to eat more than one piece of pie because, really, it's pie, but the satisfaction level was dismally, depressingly low.

I also had all this time to get some writing done, work on the house, decorate like crazy--I envisioned myself singing the Happy Little Working Song a la Enchanted in a beautiful Cinderella dress. Instead, I was sick. Absolutely drained. Had time to write. Didn't care. Had time to decorate. Didn't care. Had delectable food to eat. Didn't care.

I was sunk below the bottom-most level of the hierarchy and couldn't enjoy the most basic levels of the pyramid because of it! When you don't feel good physically, it's hard to make yourself enjoy anything else. It makes me appreciate friends of mine who are currently seriously sick and undergoing procedures and treatments. Makes me appreciate my mom who's had a minor stroke and botched heart surgery, who's on so many meds she sometimes veers to the left while trying to walk in a straight line.

When I was in high school, my history teacher had a bunch of lame sayings on his wall. One of them was the old, "Health is a crown on the well person's head, but only the sick seem to see it." I'm ashamed to admit I thought of this lameness more than once while I was sick, and I vowed that once healthy, I would never again just take it as my due. Good health is a blessing, and now that I'm starting to feel it again, I'm so grateful for it.

Of course, I had preschool this morning which totally wiped me out. Which is why I figured the laundry and dishes can wait. I'd rather sit and blog. ;-)

Missed you all!

Maslow really knew his stuff

2008-12-05T13:11:00.000-07:00

The Whitney Benefit Auction

2008-11-22T08:09:00.001-07:00

Copied and pasted directly from Kerry Blair's posts at Six LDS Writers and a Frog:

Don't miss the Whitney Benefit Auction, going on now! They have dozens of great gifts, all up for auction or buy-it-now purchase. New items are added every single day, so check back often!

We’ve got incredible stuff: Autographed books and gifts, valuable editing packages going for a song, designer clothing, home decorating accents, silk ties, massages, handcrafted note cards, food items, fine art, gorgeous jewelry, book publishing packages, children’s clothing, a family photo shoot, and much, much, much, much more. (We have, in fact, several things you can't buy anywhere else.)

If you haven’t seen the site lately, you haven’t seen it at all. Several auctions are ending very soon, so I put up more than a dozen new items and services yesterday. I’m putting up a dozen more today—including my own packages of baseball tickets, Hopi jewelry, prickly pear jelly, and an Official Nightshade Ghost-Hunting Kit. (Just where else do you think you’re going to find that?)

Whitney Auction

The Whitney Benefit Auction

2008-11-22T08:09:00.000-07:00

Broad Spectrum or Dig Deep?

2008-11-21T18:35:00.001-07:00

I had a conversation with Tristi Pinkston at the Provident Book Grand Opening about different approaches to historical fiction, and I've often thought about the approach I took to my Civil War series. Tristi and I basically discussed the difference between taking a big look at something, kind of like stepping back and taking in the panoramic view vs. narrowing in on one slice of an event and delving deeply into it.

For example, when I wrote Faith of our Fathers, my goal was to give the reader a very broad overview of the WHOLE thing. Different cities, battles, events, etc. In order to do that, I created characters and placed them in strategic places so we could see all of those events through their eyes.

This approach allowed me to look at the whole of the conflict, but at only, say, a foot below the surface. If an author were to take one particular town, for example, and focus on one family during the Civil War, she would be able to go more like six, ten, fifteen feet deep. As far as she wants to, really.

Historical Fiction is an interesting animal. Seems like people usually love it or hate it. Purist, arm-chair historians tend to prefer the nonfiction approach to history. For readers who like a more humanized, (for lack of a better word), look at history, the fictional element helps. Fiction is also more entertaining, usually, and many readers enjoy that element.

There is danger in fictionalizing history, I think. I felt this weight when I wrote the series. As an author, you run the risk of people thinking that the "truth" as you see it as an author is, in fact, gospel. Sometimes it's just personal opinion. I felt a huge responsibility to portray real, living people as they were, and not to allow my view of things to alter what they may have said or did. I would venture to guess that other authors of historical fiction would agree with me. You just don't want to get it wrong! When I wrote that series, I said a lot of prayers.

Any strong opinions on this, one way or another? Do you prefer fiction or non when it comes to reading your history? Do you like a broad overview or an in-depth chunk?

Broad Spectrum or Dig Deep?

2008-11-21T18:35:00.000-07:00

Provident Bookstore Grand Opening

2008-11-16T01:11:00.001-07:00

Left to right, Karlene Browning, Assistant Manager; Tristi Pinkston, LDS author; Jennie Hansen, LDS author; Nancy Campbell Allen, LDS author.

I stole this pic from Tristi's blog. You must click on the link at the bottom of this post to see all her other cool pictures of the store! And Tristi, thank you for letting me steal this picture. Even though you didn't know I was stealing it. (I figure it's that whole asking-for-forgiveness-than-permission thing).

It was so fun to see friends, if only for a little bit! What a fantastic store. If you are ever in Pleasant Grove, you must stop by. Candy like an old-fashioned store, awesome toys and a great collection of books.

Good stuff!
Tristi Pinkston's Blog!